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There was no-show of three recent releases at one of the multiplexes..The culprits for keeping the audience away from the multiplex were Anamika, MrWhite& Mr.Black & Pranali..I happened to be one such brave soul who had ventured to watch one of these movies but was turned away..I was informed , that the theatre management requires perhaps minimum of five people to run the show.. I waited for the remaining four to trudge in..Those absentees disappointed me..As I got up to leave I heard a voice ‘Play with me Twenty 20’!

I looked around to find out wherefrom the voice emanated..There was nobody in sight..I shrugged and ventured for the …

What Karishma Kapoor,Aishwarya Rai, Rekha, Shabana Azmi, Sharmila Tagore, Maduhri Dixit, Vyajantimala have in common.

With commercial success they want critical acclaim and an award worthy of their self perceived mettle.

As such in our Bollywood there are hardly movies that do justice to an actress’s versatility ..Rare is Erina Brokovich showcasing Julia Roberts acting prowess…Shabana Azmi does that in her social service ad campaigns.

Since critical acclaim and a national award can raise the actresses’ market value, they clamour to go all out for it..And one of the shortest routes to fame and fortune is through professin of prostitution..don’t get me wrong..i mean a screen role depicting profession of prostitution..And somehow it jells very well with the audience and makes an instant connect.

Shabana did it with Mandi..Sharmila Tagore in Mausam..Priya Rajvansh in Hanste …

Bollywood is changing..Being the largest single industry that is growing at an estimated rate of 15 percent per annum and India’s economy with a sustained growth of 9-10 percent, is fuelling this growth whereby consumers have high purchasing power and more leisure time to unwind themselves in the armless reclining seats of the multiplexes where if you don’t like the movie , instead of throwing your arms up in disgust you can put it around your partner and have paisa vasool magic moments regardless of the movie..

Indeed the things are changing in Bollywood..And the time tested 5 C’s of cinematography ( a wonderful primer by Joseph V Masscelli, for anyone interested in learning the nitty gritty of filmmaking) has undergone a complete overhaul..The new age Bollywood has retained 5 C’s but with its own twist and tadka..Now if you wanna be a filmmaker, apart from self study through …

The other day a friend of mine buttonholed me as he was itching to narrate his debut feature film script. Off drinks, off non-veg, he was a bit put off by my not adhering to Bollywood convention of listening to a script. Somehow he had always given some weightage to my opinions—perhaps that was the reason—as he agreed to go ahead with the narration in this non-Bollywood ambience sans drinks also.

Into five minutes of story telling, my vanity was punctured . He was narrating the script not to get my opinions but to show off his oratorial and directorial skills—whatever they were. More than the plot and characterization he was into camera angles—How the jimmy jib will move from low angle to up up in the sky!How the steadicam will capture the unsteady walk into the wild..Gauging a puzzled look on my face, he started adding …

This could only happen in Bollywood..Song & Dance is not the only unique feature of our Hindi Film Industry..There is this very unusual and peculiar syndrome prevalent in the industry that I think has no parallel anywhere in the world..

You join a director to assist..A hot shot one or a shot-down version..You are all excited and full of enthusiasm to learn, to get an exposure and to be part of real film-making..You have heard a lot about the director..Or you are one who is desperate enough to join any unheard of director because the real,arrived ones won’t hear you out, let alone take you as an assistant..So you join the director–any director.

You want to absorb his vision..To bask in his creativity..To contribute your own two bit..And you are in for a rude shock..Because the director concerned is not the only one who is captaining the ship..During …

A creative aspect in film making that is generally overlooked suddenly jumped to limelight courtesy Aaja Nachle..In the title song of the movie a line ‘Mochi bhi samjhe apne ko sunaar re’(A shoemaker thinks of himself as goldsmith) inadvertently created a furore that led to politics of casteism marring the box office fortunes of the movie in Hindi heartland..Suddenly everyone was discussing what are the connotations of such a line, what could be its implications and whose line and lyrics is it anyway?

And lyrics writers suddenly found themselves basking under their fifteen minutes of fame..Otherwise who cares for the lyrics writers per se in present times !

There was a time when lyrics writers commanded a presence in film making process..Those were the days when giants like Sahir Ludhianvi, Kaifi Azmi, Majhrooh Sultanpuri lent their signature to the film’s story through their soul-stirring, meaningful songs..It was poetry getting wings …

Between OM SHANTI OM(OSO),SAAWARIYA and NO SMOKING(NS) so much heat has been generated , one feels as if these are also a culprit in adding to Global Warming!

This is not about films OM SHANTI OM(OSO), SAAWARIYA & NO SMOKING(NS) per se..This is not about their reviews either..This is about makers of these films..And that too more specifically about the makers of latter two films..

For purposes of this post, just to recapitulate in brief, the box-office results of these three films—NS went up in smoke..SAAWARIYA lost steam quarter of the way..OSO burnt many a record.. But the fact remains NS & Saawariya did not warm up to the audiences..You could say , ‘So what?’..

Exactly!.. No one has the guarantee of a hit or successful film inspite of donning the impressions to the contrary..These films did not click— did not click, period..I wish the matter could rest at that..One could …

What’s common between Laaga Chunri Mein Daag (LCMD) and No Smoking (NS)..
One could say there could be no commonality whatsoever..One is proverbial chalk and another a cheese..One represents the established order and another rebels against it..One is power-centric and the other, well,ah-ahem, ego-centric..One is so stained that any cleansing is ruled out..Another is exception to the rule that you can’t have smoke without fire..One has all the brazen motives and other all the bizarre metaphors.. One has all the clichés and another has all the confusion.. …

I
Everytime I go to watch a movie at Fame Adlabs,Andheri Link Road, and visit its wash-room/ rest-room/ pee-room or plain loo, it is not only the tool I hold on but the dialogues/one-liners from various films that are framed at eye level..And looking at them a vague feeling nudges me as to what’s missing in present day fare of movies !

Then the other day in a seminar and screening (of Raman Raghav) organized by Baiscope at PVR, Juhu, Shriram Raghvan while talking on the subject of film noir mentioned that his Johnny Gaddar could not be narrated (narrated as in conventional manner)..He had given 5-6 pages of treatment and characterization to the would-be cast but he could not narrate the subject as asked for because his film was not conducive to audio-narration..I appreciate his honesty ..And I have nothing against movies being considered predominantly a visual medium and treated …

I frequently wonder what is that in Oscars that ruffles so many feathers in our film industry..Why are we so obsessed with getting pat on our back from these academy members who are to many, nothing more than an old boys association of spoilt brats..

KJO (Karan Johar) in his interview to a weekly magazine Tehleka recently acknowledged his wish to get an Oscar.. And the way he has in mind to get the weird statutette is not to make a movie with global appeal and local aesthetics..The way he has in mind is to simply visualize wearing a black suit,walking down the red carpet, sitting somewhere in the last three rows of the Kodak Theatre and then walking with wondrous expression up to the stage once an Oscar for Best Foreign Film category is announced..And the Oscar for Best Foreign Film goes to……

Now here lies a hitch..

On hearing …

Farah Khan picturises a song for OSO with 31 stars: SRK does a gig with his colleagues, contemporaries and his seniors by a generation,notably Dharmendra and Jeetendra, on whose filmy diet he grew up.. For the first time Sanjay Dutt, Salman Khan and SRK come together on big screen..Though this experiment of bringing together stalwarts of the film fraternity on one platform is not the first of its kind. More notable was Amitabh Bachchan’s symbolic gig as a waiter in Naseeb almost twenty five years ago, where he played host to giants of film world of that time– Raj Kapoor, Shammi Kapoor, Dharmendra, Rajesh Khanna,Waheeda Rehman,Sharmila Tagore, Mala Sinha et al..

This is not a comparative study between the two superstars..Shahanshah and Badshaah of Bollywood (though SRK seems to be paying an indirect compliment to Big B by doing all what the latter has done—KBC, DON, ‘wax’ ing …

An open,cubicles- laden hall and in the corner a conference room with smoked glass door of a corporate production house..Four of them were sitting in various postures– slightly reclined ,with various versions of hands- jaw locking, to listen to my narration of a script that I had been pitching for a film project..VP (content) ,henceforth called plain VP, introduced me to his other colleagues : Nisha,Asha Vishwas and Mohan..

Without much further delay I was told to shoot–my spiel :

Me : Thanks for this opportunity..My film is set in mountainous region of upper Shimla/Manali almost six thousand feet above sea level..Where our hero Dushyant is given an assignement to supervise the construction of a dam..He hurriedly accepts it..As he is preparing to leave by road from Delhi, we show a bubbly,chirpy,natkhat,chanchal girl Shakuntla flitting across the boulders of a mountain slope and rolling stones of a rivulet. She is singing …

There could not be a more apt name for a debut movie. Announcement of David Dhawan’s son Rohit Dhawan to direct a movie titled Carry On Pappu set me thinking whether selecting such a name was just a coincidence or a deliberate decision manifesting David Dhawan’s funny bone..

And this also set me on a trail of sons of the directors who have carried forward the baton successfully or not-so-successfully.

Few names that come to mind of sons of big guns and daughters of illustrious fathers :

Rahul Rawail
Raj Kumar Santoshi
Ravi Chopra
Ketan Desai
Ketan Anand
Suneil Anand
Rajiv Kapoor
Randhir Kapoor
Rishi Kapoor
Asim Samanta

Aditya Chopra
Pooja Bhatt
Meghna Gulzar
Rohit Shetty
Hriday Shetty
Farah Khan
Sajid Khan

(Note: This list is not comprehensive but representative)

All these abovementioned guysn girls had an advantage of home environment that encouraged their choices or automatically fixed them..Still some of them could not make it or make it big.

Seeing such a long list one may be deterred to follow one’s …

It does not rain,it pours..It is not one isolated case of a mobile battery exploding..One explodes and there is a barrage of incidents involving the same..It so happens that one train accident is reported and suddenly the toll mounts and the count surges of similar accidents..One Prince falls into a deep hole..suddenly there is reporting of a queue of supple bodied, flexi-limbed kids taking a plunge..At times I wonder what is happening! Is it all coincidental or a phenomena of critical mass or deliberate attempt to manipulate and influence reality?

It is more apparent in Bollywood’s culture of controversies..Are they for real or carefully constructed products? Even if one is cynical enough to brush them aside as cunning and conning creations does it really steer people away from the issue that has been raised? I doubt because no matter how unbiased one may try to be one willy-nilly joins the …

A story and an anecdote..To put across my hypothesis:

Once upon a time there was an innkeeper who was unable to make ends meet even though he did his very best to draw customers by making the inn comfortable, the service cordial, and the prices reasonable.So in despair he consulted a sage..
The sage told him to change inn’s name.
Impossible! said the innkeeper. ‘ For generations it has been known as Seven Stars and is well known all over the country.’
No,’ said the sage firmly. ‘you must now call it the Five Bells and have a row of six bells hanging at the entrance.’
Six bells? But that’s absurd! What good would that do?
Give it a try and see, said the sage with a smile.

Well the innkeeper gave it a try. And this is what he saw..Every traveller who passed by the inn walked in to point out the mistake, each …

Rajat Kapoor is flush with Rs 20 crores from PNC..The deal to make six films.

Farhan Akhtar inks a deal with Studio 18 for Rs 230 crores..The deal is to make six films.

Indian Film Company to invest the money raised upto 50million pounds to make 40-50 films.Six of them have been announced.

Planman motion pictures is accelerating its film production business and ready to roll out its six projects.

The number six is coincidental..

What is essential is the announcement of so many projects by these production houses..There is nothing new in films being treated as a project..Because film is not only creative inputs, it requires so many other elements to be put together and tied up properly to bring it to the screens,monitors, LCDs, or mobile screens(in near future).

If ever there was any doubt about Bollywood being business, it is scotched with entry of corporate production houses,makeover of indie producers into …

24 frames = 1/1/2 feet

1/1/2 feet in 1 second

90 feet in 60 seconds/1minute

900 feet in 10 minutes

12000 feet in 120minutes

Shooting ratio : 1 to 4

Raw Stock:48000 ft

400 feet = 1 Can

48000 feet = 120 Cans

Final Film Length :12000 feet = 3634 meters approx in 2 hrs

Block Lenses-40mm/50mm/75mm/100mm

Wide Angle Lenses- 24mm/28mm/35mm

Telephoto Lens- 135mm/200mm/400mm

Zoom Lens- 70 to 300mm

Arrie 235, 435, 35BL, BL2

Film Format- Super 8/16mm/35mm

Film Stock- Vision 2 500T 7279/7218/ Vision 2 220T/250D/100T/100D………

As I was cranking up these numbers Oz comes along and says what is this blabber about..What’s the purpose of this post?

And I submit with utter humility…Do you think I am liking it? Do you think I enjoy this arithmatic in such an arty field? If you can torture our patience with this mystery of 1 for so many days, I think cinephiles and my fellow PFCites can bear with this spiel at least for few moments.

Just …

It starts with an odd news item in print media..About the movie..About the movie’s story or some salacious gossip..And then gradually the swell is created..Promos are cut..Hype is generated..Marketing strategies are evolved..As if it is war out there (Actually it is war out there, if one goes by wisdom of Al Ries and Jack Trout)..To go for a blitz or carpet bombing…To make Charge of the Light Brigade with entire cavalry (Meaning 900 plus prints) or to go for guerilla attack (100 minus prints)..To go for merchandise or serve plain malai!! Tie-ups with channels…Tie-ups with sponsors..Tie-ups just for the sake of tying up! Media partners..Mobile partners..Mortgage partners..Mafia partners!!!After courting so many partners, reasons for partnership are sought.. promotional tools are explored..In-film branding..product endorsements..Billboards, FM radio, Road shows,One for the road!!!! Hard Talk with the Hero..Soft Talk with the Heroine..Direct Talk with the Director..Everyone talking of ‘Hatkey’ role and …

Without wasting any time on the prologue let me take you straight through a fascinating journey spanning almost forty years of Hindi Films with some very interesting films and facts that plotted Hindi Films’ evolutionary march and became milestones in their own right by contributing something extraordinary and distinct to cinema’s ever expanding reach.

Late Sixties : Year 1969 : SAAT HINDUSTANI :

A movie based on true incidents during Goa’s liberation struggle enumerating the real life adventures of a band of revolutionaries with a tagline– A love story of a nation. This film was written,produced and directed by a maverick Khwaja Ahmed Abbas who lived and died upholding his own set of …

‘Aur tu kya kar raha hai aaj kal.’
‘Bas kat rahi hai Airtel waale ki tarah.’
‘Tere uss projekt ka kya hua’
‘Pata nahin yaar, kab shuru hoga,uparwaala jaane.’
‘Toh phir ho kya raha hai?’
‘Struggle.’

‘Kal ki picture dekhi?’
‘Haan, mast thhi.’
‘Pakka saala koi na koi issey copy karneywaala hai.’
‘Main bhi yehi soch raha thha.’
‘Ye copy karkey hit ho jayenge aur hum strugglers yunhi festivals dekhte reh jayenge.’

‘hi boss,wassup’.
‘Nothing much.’
‘When are you going on floor.’
‘Trying to get funding yaar.’
‘Are you trying corporates or private producers?’
‘I am looking for corporate funds man. This private ones are so filmy.’

These were few of the comments overheard by me at a recently concluded French Film Festival held at Fun Republic,Andheri,Mumbai. Just because the passes for the day’s film were strictly on first-cum-first-served basis, the serpentine queues started forming almost two hours before the show timings and provided enough masala worthy of many short films.

This post is not about the review …