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“MAA” may be the most used word in the Indian film industry but I wanted to take a look at another complex human relation that has often been ignored. The father and son relation. There have been films from time to time that have taken a fresh look at this relation and explored new facets. I am not talking of the general father gets killed- son takes revenge films but movies that often helped the viewers understand their own complex relations. After all, fathers and sons share a relation that is most complex…across the world.

These are movies/scenes from movies that I liked and felt that they showed fathers & sons in a different light - please feel free to add your own.

1) Aamir Khan and Daleep Tahil in QSQT: Not the entire film - but one particular scene moved me. Aamir Khan has been caught by goga kapoor outside his house and Goga calls up daleep tahil and aloknath and fires them. Daleep Tahil is furious and is waiting for Aamir to come home ( to take him to task). He and Aloknath have a war of words at this moment. Aamir Khan comes home. But, instead of fireworks - he hold onto Daleep Tahil and cries his guts out. Daleep holds him and then only tells him to go to his room. One scene that showed how fathers can actually understand what a son needs.Touching.

2) Aamir Khan and his father in Dil Chahta Hai: There are two scenes which stand out for me (in fact most of the men I spoke to can relate to these). Scene 1) aamir khan is having breakfast withhis father and his father asks him - have you ever thought what you want to do? Traditionally the son would have given a lecture on his desires and ambitions. Here Khan nonchallantly says - nahin and grins. His father is exapserated. Very life like. Scene 2) Aamir Khan is on the phone with is father from Australia and they are talking. Aamir khan is silent for some time since he is crying but doesnt want to let his father know. His father knows. And tells him to come home immediately. Another scene which shows how fathers can be not only sensitive but very understanding of their son’ s feelings.

3) Hritik Roshan and Boman Iraani in lakshya: I think that this movie was never about the war of Kargil. But more about Hritiks war to find acceptance and understand himself and his relations. The intital scenes were about Boman never giving his son a chance and running him down for being a total waste. When Hritik leaves the NDA and comes back, more than the fact that preity dumps him it is what he overhears his father saying that makes him a man. The telephone sequences when they talk man to man can leave a lump in your throat. It is only when Boman is proud of Hritik that hritiks lakshya is achieved.

4) Jackie and Amrish Puri in gardish: A honest constable wants his son to be a police officer - its his dream. Jackie is sincere in his portralyal of the bespectacled young man who wants to achieve his fathers dream. Then a chance encounter with a goonda gets him labelled as a goonda. His father is heartbroken. The film then talks about the relation they share and how it changes. A very sincere film.

5) Shahrukh Khan and Amitabh Bachchan in Kabhie Khushi Kabhie Gham. A lot of people called this film childish and purile. At the cost of getting lynched by the readers - I feel that this film might be glossy but the underlying theme was always about AB and SRK and how it hurt them more to be apart from each other. AB, the strict father, throws out his son for marrying someone he did not prefer. Unlike most films where fathers and sons would mope for each other, the film moves on a different track where the father and son never speak about each other. SRK has his reasons for not coming home - he was adopted, loved and then told to leave. AB has his reasons for throwing out SRK.( in any case how did he marry kajol so fast - right after her father died!!??). The laast scene has AB giving a monlogue while tears roll down his cheeks. In fact a lot of people have told me that the scene in the end where AB is looking at the family portrait and turns around have left them speechless and wanting to have shared such a moment with their father.

6) Sunny Deol and Amrish Puri in Ghatak: Amrish puri is a freedom fighter who was given a certificate of appreciation by Gandhi. Sunny, his loving son, is a simple, shy body builder and they stay in Benaras. Sunny brings him to bombay to have him treated for his prolonged illness that later on turns out to be cancer. The scene where sunny is fighting from pillar to post to get his father admitted is a rare scene when sunny deol has acted in his career. Also, when he comes to know that his father is going to die and holds him and cries and Amrish puri understands everything without a word being exchanged between the two. Amrish puri is later on abused and made to act like a dog by Danny and his brothers. He dies and eventually the film becomes a revenge saga. However, a film I remember more for the father and son scenes rather than Sunny beating up dozens of goondas in rage.

7) Amitabh Bachchan and Dilip Kumar in Shakti : AB was the actual angry young man in this film. A kidnapped child hears his father turn down the offer made by the kidnappers - Dilip kumar refuses to release a gangster in lieu of his hostage son. This creates a lifelong rift between them. Amitabh could never love his father and Dilip could never understand why his son had moved away. The film explored their relation beautifully with an excellent performance by Rakhee as the moderator betwen them. The film ends with Dilip Kumar shooting AB onthe tarmac and AB dying in his father’s arms knowing eventually that his father loved him.

Amitabh and Sanjeev Kumar in Trishul - a bastard son takes revenge on his father. and when the father has lost everything, the son returns it all. The dialogue that moved the country was - ” aur aap Mr. R. K. Gupta, mere naajaayaz baap hain!” For the first time someone called the father as illegitimate and not the son.

I guess that the 70’s were the years when Amitabh and Dharmendra glorified the role of the mother. Deewar - being the most famous of them all. The angst ridden youth of the ’70s was frustrated with growing corruption, unemployement, the emergency, student politics etc. When AB was hailed as the angry young man, it was a character that was a idol for the youth - a man who comes from the streets, fights for what he feels is right, abuses the politicians and has that deep rooted anger within him that simmered inside everybody. The role of the mother became important since she was looked upon someone who loved her son inspite of all this. which in turn meant an acceptance for the actions. Father’s never played an important role ( satyen kapoo in deewar ran away after the first reel and his son has to live with a tatoo which says ” mera baap chor hai”). I feel that it is only in recent times that the father and son relation has been explored in a mature way. And I am not talking of films like baap Numbari Beta Dus Nambari!

Do let me have your views - guys - all of you are sons and some are fathers as of now - I am sure you may have something to share…

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