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filmictionary
p.s the article below may or may not reflect times and tides in the Mumbai film industry. My thoughts are driven by Hyderabad and its business with the movies.
I have spent time (way too much!) introspecting /watching /observing/ the business of filmmaking. I have spent a lot of time, just thinking about what it takes to survive and be someone in this place, we call the film industry.
Everyone who is a success, whether a Yash Chopra or an Anurag Kashyap, deserves praise. Whether we like them, their films or not is immaterial. But for anyone to grudge their success, is…is futile and immature.
What the fuck am I talking about? This is films, right? Is this any place for us to set standards and have standards or achieve standards. Is this an art form or business disguised in the form of art? What is every filmmaker setting out to achieve? (ok, enough of my moralistic bull shit!)
So yeah it time for some fun, lets categorize them.
1.We have the Deal makers…people who make projects happen on speculation. They start off with a ‘concept’ of a story…get actors to sign in based on promise of returns and rewards….and finally zone in on a financier who has been dreaming about rubbing shoulders with his favorite star.
general description: he is a smooth talker, sharp tounge, wonderful liar, convincing con artist, impressionist director.
2.The Pimper’s….are a group of people who were previously DM’s, but have found continued box office success through their slut (pun intended) of films, that they really don’t have to smooth talk anymore. They don’t even need to lie. They just exist. Making a continous smooth living. Cracking films after films. With star after starlet. Living the life.
general description: he has a nice bungalow and a set of DM’s as card playing partners.
3.The Ass lickers…..are not really filmmakers. They are the borderline filmmakers. Meaning they are people who were/are involved in the film business….not directing or producing…but more like, makeup,catering etc. They also have other businesses,I mean… Anything goes, from pimping to filming. They do everything. Working on pure adrenalin pumped, ass licking, gets them dates and money from those same old starstruck financiers.
general description: he paints his nails.
4.The Wind blowers….are filmmakers, who blow Kurusowa to the ground. They do everything, from running down the latest films, to running down the great masters. They tell the world to wait and watch the movie they are ‘making’. Many of these people exist. Funnily none of their films do.
general description: they come in all shapes and sizes…they have expressive hands and unstoppable eyebrows.
5. The Veterans- they pride the movies they made and the times in which they were made in. They also take pride in the films they make currently. Placing their old charm values over new ones. Looking down in disdain at anyone in a pair of jeans.
general description: ahem, oldish…okay old. and women in their films are kept in their places.
6.The Lost souls- me and countless others….well, not countless maybe, okay make that two…maybe three idiots….maybe 4….not more then 5 for sure….no wait, there’s more, I am loosing count now….well, a few I guess. Who are always bickering…
7.The Filmmakers- there are a few left. Don’t get to see them too often. They lie low.
Moral of the article:
It doesn’t really matter who you really are. What matters is if you were successful just doing what you were doing….period.
12 Responses to “filmictionary”
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your point 7 - hmmmm I donno what to comment.
well sorry to say but i dont belive in the theory of being successful for the sake of it!!!!!!!!
aint their any place for self dignity andf moral values?????
whats a DM.. sorry missed that..dont judge me on my ignorance.
DM = Deal Maker (See 1)
Anish,its the same here in mumbai. but the number “6″ guys will surely move to number “7″. the world is not that bad. it has happened in the past n will happen again n again.
“1″ ??
Huh! its all same everywhere…Mumbai or chennai or Hyderabad…Same soul…different garb:-??
I agree with you On number “7″ w.r.t TFI (Telugu Film Insustry) I think its cycle of things and I hope that new wave of cinema is going to come and clean all the kachra very soon and I hope this lasts for a while.
But I’m suprised that number “5″ are not at all considering to do anything regarding this kachra, just keeping their mouth shut.
“1″?
WTF is this “1″?
8) refuges: people who found it difficult to survive in the not so spicy world and have found themselves a an existence in the industry. (they represent the major part of our industry-’ies)
general description:they look like filmmakers
9)fingers: they love to pleasure a certain section of people. these are the people who love to be under tents and move in packs. they are the most protected people….
And last but not the least ….
10) Gasbags: They make their movies box office hits with their hot-air propaganda. Their stars are either vacuous wooden faced demi gods or pneumatically well endowed goddesses, whose call sheets cost the producer a hand and a leg.
general description: high flying, multi movie making, award function adorning, and mega buck making phonies.
Anish, my man. The day you leave your bitterness behind, you will be what you want to be….. everything I see about you (posts, movie etc)screams of bitterness. Like those loud screaming & yelling dialogues. They work when they come at right time and stay for a right period of time. Otherwise we will all get tired of the screamfest.
Be an angry young man but don’t get old being angry.
Good luck mate.
Anish
I second Yash’s comments (the one above this). We know you had a hell a lot of tough time in the TFI. As others say ‘it is same all over the country’. Being close to people like Sekhar Kammula, I expecting you to get inspired and turn this bitterness/frustation into success. Am sure it was not easy for Shekar and Chandra Sekhar Eleti.
yash and madhu
but i wrote what i did, smiling :)
my angst vanished after ‘confessions’ released.
but i understand what your’e saying. PFC will see a new me, the next time round.
thanks for the feedback
anish.