I plead guilty – I am a Marxist
“No, Groucho is not my real name, I’m just breaking it in for a friend.”
Groucho Marx had a rare gift of effortless effrontery without a trace of malice and a free-spirited sense of humor that saw him taste success, uniquely, across vaudeville, theatre, radio, cinema and television. A tribute to a comic legend of all times.
While watching Woody Allen’s Hannah and Her Sisters, one crucial plot point intrigued me. Allen’s near suicidal hero walks into a theatre that was playing an old comedy. As he sits there watching it, he comes to realize that humor and a few laughs are strong enough arguments to continue to live on. I went around looking for the comedy that was playing which could engineer such cataclysmic change. It was Duck Soup (1933), Marx Brothers’ last with Paramount and one of their biggest box-office disappointments. It was, indeed, cinema ahead of its time and years later, Duck Soup, is now regarded as one of the greatest American films (in 1998 AFI rated it among the Top 100). Allen, one of the greatest Groucho fans, paid his own homage to possibly the best mad caper of all times by making it an important element of the script.
Groucho’s was humor without deep social or political message. It was humor for the sake of pleasure, a selfish pursuit of happiness with no desire for elevating human soul. His impact between the 30s-50s of last century and since then on popular culture has been immense.
Some of the greatest Groucho lines have passed on to be come legends to the extent that quite often, these days, they go unacknowledged. I quote just three:
“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.”
“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll make an exception.”
“Last night I shot an elephant in my pyjamas. How he got in my pyjamas I don’t know.”
Julius Henry (“Grouch”) Marx (1890-1977) grew up in an impoverished Upper East Side area of New York, the third son of German-Jewish immigrants, Sam and Minnie. A middle child in a sibling set of five, Groucho, grew up with a sense of neglect unique to middle children in families. A bright student who took pleasure in books, Groucho’s life was forever changed when his cash-strapped but ambitious mother, one day, discovered his singing abilities. Groucho was dispatched to the school of vaudeville and three other brothers followed his lead to create their singing group named The Four Nightingales. Groucho discovered his abilities of word-play and turn of phrase on stage and the Nightingales transformed to The Marx Brothers with each brother bringing a unique characteristic to their stage persona – Chico took on an Italian accent, Harpo never spoke on stage ever, Zeppo played the lead and Groucho did most of the talking.
Over years, Groucho collaborated with some of the best comic writers of the time – Perelman, Benchley, Kaufman and Sheekman – to blaze a trail across vaudeville, Broadway, Radio and eventually Cinema. All this while, he built the Groucho image of the large cigar on his lips, greasepaint moustache, languorous slouch and a distinct lilt in his voice. Groucho’s humor was essentially a mix of irreverence towards authority, brash and brazen views on society and a remarkable felicity for puns all topped off with perhaps the best ad-libbing talent in history. He cultivated the image of an easy-going rascal, gruff and amoral with little time for niceties. This image allowed him to get away with murder on and off screen.
After having survived over a decade of vaudeville circuit – small towns, makeshift theatres and hoodlum managers – culminating with their act at the Palace, the Brothers shifted focus to the new medium in town, Radio. While it took a while for Groucho to taste success here, one of their earliest shows on the mad antics within a law firm, Flywheel, Shyster and Flywheel (1933), did reflect Groucho’s ability to adapt to the medium. A short exchange from the show between Groucho, playing Mr. Flywheel, and his secretary Miss Dimple is almost a precursor to the Catch-22 kind of humor.
Groucho: Well, when he gets here tell him to go down to the post office and have our inkwells filled. And while he’s there, he can mail this letter.
Miss Dimple: But this letter has no stamp on it.
Groucho: Well, tell him to drop it in the box when nobody’s looking.
Miss Dimple: But, Mr. Flywheel, a stamp only costs three cents.
Groucho: For three cents I’d deliver it myself.
Miss Dimple: Anyway, this letter is too heavy for one stamp. I think we’d better put two stamps on it.
Groucho: Nonsense. If we put two stamps, it’ll still be heavier.
Two of the biggest grossers of the 1930s were the Brothers’ A Night at the Opera (1935) and A Day at the Races (1937) which they made with their new studio Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer. For the first time, the Brothers received sizeable budgets, a good cast and publicity which coupled with their screen companion, Margaret Dumont (often referred to as the Fifth Marx), meant Marx Brothers were into the mainstream now. A Night at the Opera is a comic masterpiece with Groucho playing Otis Driftwood who is hired by a wealthy woman Mrs. Claypool with the sole purpose of putting her into the ‘society’. One of the scenes where Mrs. Claypool is about lose her composure when she finds Otis having dinner with another lady while Groucho is trying to pacify her is an all-time favorite.
Mrs. Claypool: Three months ago you promised to put me into society. In all that time, you’ve done nothing but draw a very handsome salary.
Groucho: You think that’s nothing, huh? How many men do you suppose are drawing handsome salaries nowadays? Why you can count them on the fingers of one hand, my good woman.
Mrs. Claypool: I’m not your good woman!
Groucho: Don’t say that. I don’t care what your past has been. To me you’ll always be my good woman, because I love you. There, I didn’t mean to tell you, but you, you dragged it out of me. I love you.
Mrs. Claypool: It’s rather difficult to believe that when I find you dining with another woman
Groucho: That woman? Do you know why I sat with her?
Mrs. Claypool: No –
Groucho: Because she reminded me of you
Mrs. Claypool: Really?
Groucho: Of course! That’s why I’m sitting here with you, because you remind me of you.
Groucho’s run-ins with establishment within Hollywood and with critics and trade magazines had the same quality of disdain for authority. He once sent an article to the editor of Variety with this line in the mail –
Dear Abel:
I trust this is illiterate enough even for your sheet.
His most famous skirmish was with legal department of Warner Brothers soon after the Marx Brothers had announced their project A Night in Casablanca. WB thought that the Marx Brothers were out to make a quick buck cashing in on the popularity and sent Groucho a legal notice. Groucho’s response is a masterpiece in loopy retorts.
Dear Warner Brothers:
Apparently there is more than one way of conquering a city and holding it as your own. For example, up to the time that we contemplated making this picture, I had no idea that the city of Casablanca belonged exclusively to Warner Brothers. However, it was only a few days after our announcement appeared that we received you long ominous legal document warning us not to use the name Casablanca. It seems that in 1471, Ferdinand Balboa Warner, your great-great-grandfather, while looking for a shortcut to the city of Burbank, had stumbled upon the shores of Africa and, raising his alpenstock (which he later turned in for a hundred shares of common), named it Casablanca.
I just don’t understand your attitude. Even if you plan on re-releasing your picture, I am sure that the average movie fan could learn in time to distinguish between Ingrid Bergman and Harpo. I don’t know whether I could, but I certainly would like to try.
You claim your own Casablanca and that no one else can use that name without your permission. What about “Warner Brothers”? Do you own that, too? You probably have the right to use the name Warner, but what about Brothers? Professionally, we were Brothers long before you were. Before us there had been other brothers – the Smith Brothers, the Brothers Karamazov; Dan Brothers, an outfielder with Detroit; and “Brother, Can you spare a dime?” (This was originally “Brothers, can you spare a dime?” but this was spreading a dime pretty thin, so they threw out one brother and gave all the money to the other one.”)
Two other instances of his ability to ridicule in almost any circumstance:
When Groucho won the Peabody Award for being Radio’s Best Comedian of the Year, it turned out he had never heard of the awards or of the late George Peabody, in whose honor the award is named. “It’s a good thing the guy died, otherwise, we couldn’t have won any prizes.”
Just before taking on, possibly, his most important role that of the quizmaster in NBC’s quiz program ‘You Bet Your Life’, Groucho started an article on television with these immortal lines:
“I must say I find television very educational. The moment somebody turns it on I go into the library and read a good book.”
The TV program was the perfect vehicle for Groucho to showcase his full repertoire – from planned gags to ad-libs – he was the first acknowledge television star. His ability to create humor with regular unsuspecting participants of quiz program was legendary. Few examples:
To a cartoonist: If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in shower
To a dress designer who said women dress for themselves, not for men: If they dressed for me, the stores wouldn’t sell much – just an occasional sunglasses or something.
To an economist: I made a killing on the Wall Street a few years ago….I shot my broker.
Groucho: Now, where are you from? Are you from Pasadena?
Man: I was born right here.
Groucho: Right here? I realize that you have been standing there for a while but I didn’t think it was that long.
Groucho had once remarked, “And I do hear that humorists never die of old age – the strain is too much for them.” When he did, in 1977, at the ripe old age of 87, he did it in the same week that Elvis Presley passed away. The King’s death took the entire spotlight away from Groucho and for once in his life he wasn’t the brazen funny center of all attention. May be Groucho was right; the strain was too much for him. All said and not done, I remain an eternal Marxist. How about you?
Acknowledgements:
1. The Groucho Letters, Simon and Schuster
2. The Essential Groucho, edited by Stefan Kanfer, Penguin Humour
3. Marx Brothers cover article, Time, Aug 13, 1932
Anurag Kashyap
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subrat.. nice post.. me a marxist too
Anurag – You, a marxist!! I would never have guessed. Thanks, in the midst of all this sniping, I thought Groucho might give a moment of relief. Also, he is almost forgotten among the current generation so it felt nice to re-introduce him.
as they say in DU, commie… i believe its atrend to be a commie in DU…
My favourite ‘Marxism’ — ‘I didn’t like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions – the curtain was up’. Even his ravingly sexist ones — ‘Women should be obscene and not heard’ — have me grinning. Next to Somerset Maugham, this is one person I’d kill to have met. Wonderful post.
dint understand a word of the post till i did a small google on the guy…
hmmmmmmmmmmm
interesting… i guess i am converting into a Marxist then…(as is obvious, havent seen his movies… just liked/liking his quotes a lot)
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/g/groucho_marx.html
and yeah… then it made a lot more sense… and i liked the post :d
Bhavani – thanks for sharing a few more. How abt this one: The best way to tell a bad egg is to break it gently
:)
Somerset Maugham: Now that’s one amazing writer and ‘Rain’ will always be special as the first serious piece of literature that I read as a child. One Maugham quote: If you want to eat well in England, eat three breakfasts.
My list of people I would kill to meet would possibly have Oscar Wilde a notch higher than Maugham.
rbehemoth – Thanks for taking time to google on Groucho and liking his quotes. It’s heartening since rekindling an interest in Groucho was the purpose of the post. A Night in the Opera is widely available so pls see if you can pick it up and watch it.
a few more Marxism:
Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them… well, I have others.
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
@Subrat, I don’t care to belong to any club that will accept me as a member..it’s not me,Groucho remarking..But i definitely am in your club so far preferring Oscar Wilde is concerned..
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife. :D
Wonderful post. Here is one more i found from Wiki
One quip from Marx concerned his response to Sam Wood, the director of the classic film A Night at the Opera. Wood was furious with the Marx Brothers’ ad-libs and antics on the set and yelled to all in disgust that he “cannot make actors out of clay.” Without missing a beat, Groucho responded, “Nor can you make a director out of Wood.”
Thanks Subrat for the great post!!
Nice one Subrat…Enjoyed reading this one.
Here’s something I found:
On May 6, 1972, the 81-year-old Groucho made his final faltering and moving appearance in New York, at the Carnegie Hall. With havoc of Vietnam preying on his conscience and consciousness he recalled an old Irving Berlin song in which the devil sings thus to his son:
You stay down here where you belong
The folks above you, they don
Krysh, Apoorva, My Alter Ego – Thanks for adding them on. This post has given me more satisfaction than any other.
Vinayak – that’s a wonderful piece that you have dug out by MJ Akbar! It seems to be a month of revising my opinion of MJ Akbar. I have been reading his book on Kashmir, ‘Beyond the Vale.”
Phoenixnu – Now that you say, hmmm, there’s some resemblance
Haven