Ma, why I feel guilty to be son of a super star?
Ma,
I can not write to the Dad as I fear my thoughts may hurt him deeply but I can share my feelings with you. I am not producing any systematic case study but my inner conflict before you. It will be difficult for you to read thoughts coming out of my vacillating mind so please bear with me.
I am highly confused and my confusion is increasing day by day and along with this my guilt is also increasing as I feel that I am no more a devoted son because I don’t respect anymore cinematic work done by my Dad.
This is not something which is expected from the son of a super star. Sons and daughters of Super stars remain under mesmerisation effect of their Dad or Mom’s works. When I am away from India, I find it quite ridiculous to see reactions of these star sons and daughters on the below average works of their parents.
Not that I was not passing through this phase. I also used to feel proud in every success of my Dad.
Super star itself means he is liked by millions of people and he is the king of box office. But I am helpless here.
There are many films made on the subject of a conflict between father and son and I am not trying to write such a script. I am really a tormented soul today.
You know, I wish right this moment, while I am writing to you that I should not have been exposed to the better things. I wish that I should not have been sent to study cinema at one of the best places. Now I believe that Ignorance is bliss sometimes.
I have seen better things happening in the world. Social, economical, cultural and political happenings in the world agitate me thoroughly and my mind goes on thinking.
My Dad is one of the biggest stars of Hindi films. It is commendable what he has achieved in last 20 years. He started very young and earned his place. He had no backing and yet he made his place at a time when sons of popular stars were making their entries and all these years he has proved his worth as a commercially saleable star at box office. Knowing the functioning of Hindi film industry, his success is not less than a fairy tale. Naturally people are always jealous to him.
He had been my hero and I was mesmerised by him like a son would become with his highly successful father. He had struggled a lot in his life but I was born with, if not silver spoon then spoon made of good stainless steel and I have been enjoying my upbringing amidst all the luxuries. I have never felt that I did not get anything I have desired. You and Dad fulfilled every wish of mine. I feel lucky to have such doting parents.
Then what are my problems? Why I am sad and confused?
It is a long story Mom.
I don’t know when exactly I started feeling this way?
I remember I used to get happiness by attending premiers of films with you and Dad. Dad used to get attention, praises and clapping and it all always gave me a feeling that I was son of a film star who was really something.
Directors, producers and writers always remain in efforts to make a film or two with Dad. He has been in high demand. This has been continued for so many years.
I was a child then. I remember Dad saying in interviews that he would not impose his wishes on his children and whatever they want to become he would support them.
I was around 11 when I had realised first time that I also wanted to join the film world. I felt that I wanted to make films. I had come under the magic of the cinematic world.
Dad should have one of the richest DVD libraries among Hindi cinema people. He has DVDs of best of the films made in India and elsewhere in the world. He has collection of best books ever published on cinema. He subscribes to all the cinema related magazines published anywhere in the world.
Today I see clearly that seeds of my confusions were germinated in that library of Dad.
Dad was not systematically exposed to the best of the cinema in his childhood and youth days but I introduced myself very early to the best of the cinema curtsy Dad’s library. You remember I started spending hours and hours in that library watching movies and reading cinema related books.
Its clear that children learn quickly everything what they have at home.
For you and Dad it was good because I was not following many other star sons of my age. They were seen wasting their times in awkward activities while I was studying cinema on my own because I wanted to make films. Both of you certainly might have felt pleasure to see me focussed on what I wanted to do.
But I tell you this exposure affected me deeply. Now I was able to differentiate among good average and bad cinema. True, initially my thoughts were not clear and I was only able to figure out that I was not enjoying formula films released every month.
You know Mom, I have not been able to disclose to any of my friend here that I am son of a super star of India. When my batch mates talk about world class films then I feel little shy and I feel fear also what if they see films of my Dad. I know clearly that none of the Dad’s film can be counted among even few best films of Hindi cinema leave alone Indian cinema and what to talk about world cinema.
Recently I have joined a club of Indian students who love cinema. Many of them are not studying in film schools but in different universities in different subjects but films unite them. I have found these guys laughing over the films of Dad and other members of this super star club. And I am not able to resist them. I don’t feel any courage or energy to do so. On what ground can I protest their thinking?
Few days ago one person rightly said something and I, as a cine student, was in agreement with his hypothesis. He said,” Most of the films featuring superstars are like products coming out of factories. We know certain parameters are fixed and we know what would be the quality of the end product. Thrill factor is lost while watching such films about which everything can be anticipated easily”.
I also do feel that after a certain stage film making becomes an Industrial production type job for most of the makers.
It was professed there that nothing is wrong in making hit, super hit films but repetition of same kind of stories or formulas is sickening and as any industry needs a strong R&D back up for its growth, cinema also needs research oriented subjects and approach. New stories, new contents, new treatments and new approaches and new talents and faces are always needed for the further growth of the Hindi cinema also.
Super stars, including Dad have earned a lot of money and their position is strong at BO and they are in a position to take risks in terms of subjects. They can select new subjects and new stories. If they don’t take a chance how they would know whether people will like their experiments or not?
As a film student if I have to select 10 best representative films of Hindi cinema released in the era after 1990 then perhaps I will not be able to collect 10 such films but I can definitely select more than 100 good films made between a period of 1950-1985.
And Dad and his super star colleagues have been working in the films in this period of last 20 years only out of which I can not select even 10 films. If anyhow I get success in picking up those 10 films then I am sure that none of the Dad’s film will be included in those 10 films.
Does not this situation make me uncomfortable?
Does not it make me guilty because somewhere I feel that I am quite harsh on my Dad, who has been working very hard to bring happiness to his family.
But mine film student format overshadows the son and later son starts feeling guilty.
Dad is committing same mistake which was done by so many super stars of yester years. They always worked in similar kind of formula films and never came out of that self chosen cage and we know that today hardly they are remembered.
I don’t want that same should be happened to my Dad also. He has earned enough fame and money. I will be proud if he does some quality films also.
I know he can do as he has capabilities. He is a good actor but a fearing one. He has been trapped in his image.
Everybody has weaknesses and nobody is above limitations but my problem starts with Dad and his friends that they don’t even try to come out of their pre-decided notion about cinema. They are doing same circus since many years. They watch quality cinema but they don’t try to do quality cinema.
This is my problem. I find its like mathematics and unless they try to solve difficult questions how can they excel? If they don’t yearn for interesting and different characters how their acting skills can be improved? How they can accept so happily awards every year for their below average performances done in the films having even much lower standards than their own performances? Just because they sell at box office they are treated as greats in the field?
Am I turning as a rebel, Mom?
I don’t know?
Exposure which I have got in last 2-3 years has changed me immensely and I am not able to digest these things. I feel concern about Dad that’s why I am writing to you else I could have followed my inner feelings and simply could have gone away from him in my outer world also. But I want him to contribute to the cinema which has given him everything, name, money and success. Its his duty to contribute in the growth of the medium.
Please Mom, for the sake of him and his capabilities, bring him out of this confined castle. Open the windows so that he enjoys the fresh air.
Last week I saw this latest film of ……uncle. He had started career atleast 2-3 years before my Dad. He has been playing endlessly a lover boy in all his films in all these 20 years. I feel flabbergasted to see that actress opposite him in this so called romantic film is hardly 2-3 years older than me.
He was obviously looking like her father on screen but he has a grip on box office and this rubbish film is already earning moolah on box office all over. I don’t know how his son, Ryan, is going to take this film? He should turn 15 in coming week.
Thank God Dad does not do purely romantic flicks, though he is not much different in terms of repeating similar kind of roles as he is still doing same action comedies which he used to do in 1990.
I don’t understand one thing because I have seen closely Dad and his super star colleagues and I know that they like variety in every other thing in life, be it their clothing style or food habits or interior decoration of their rooms and offices. they buy latest gadgets, they visit newer places and they try many new and different things but why they have not become tired by doing similar kind of films in the last 20 years? That remains a mystery to me.
Why repetition of doing same stuff day in day out does not bring boredom to them? How its possible for a living and progressive mind to repeat same thing again and again? They are actors and actors are understood as owners of creative minds.
A creative mind needs new thoughts as that keeps it fertile. But this is lost in this case of Dad and his friends as far as acting in the films is concerned.
In real life they are aging then why they are stuck at same age on the screen in the past 20 years?
Why characters played by them have not changed and matured?
While sitting alone here in my room, whenever I remember all those trophies decorated in our house which he has won for his mediocre and very average films, I feel bit frustrated inside.
I don’t have any method to prepare my Dad for a better creative world but as a wife you certainly can help your husband. You know him best. You are the closest person to him.
People in that film club were almost abusing my Dad and other super stars and I found them right also on so many accounts because better actors and better films deserved awards in all those years but somehow awards have been given to the films which earn more money at box office.
Tomorrow your son is going to join real film world and he will certainly not make formula films and perhaps he will be turned as a failure on box office.
In future I, your son, will be joining the directors who make good films which are flopped at box office because big stars don’t work in such films and audiences are conditioned to watch films starring big stars because a myth has been created that best entertainment lies in these so called big budget entertaining films.
Hope Dad will pave a way for a changing world and my entry will and survival will be easy then. I have learnt one thing that any change has to be started from the home.
If Dad does even few good films then perhaps his son will feel proud inside and he will get confidence to introduce him as a son of an actor.
I know you would understand it clearly that this is a conflict between a son and a student of cinema. I love Dad as a son but I am unable to respect his cinematic work as a student of cinema.
People do same work whole their lives and their children don’t face any problem with that fact as I am feeling.
I know very well he is not what he appears on screen but even then his cinematic works is affecting his personal image before me as two things are mixed.
And then as a son I have great expectations also from him. I can not join other star sons, who are always busy in praising their fathers when whole world knows that their fathers are doing very average films.
Perhaps I have more faith in the capabilities of my Dad and may be because I am going to work in the same field where he has been working and my ideas are different than his so I am trying to impose my ideas on him. I don’t know but I feel this way and I have opened my heart before you.
Many super stars of yester years, since the days of Ashok Kumar, have been giving some great films in their respective filmi career in the same hindi cinema and their children have been feeling proud on the achievements of their respective fathers. Very good actors have been there in the same hindi cinema who have always given great films to the world and though their films have not shaken the box office as films of my Dad and his friends do but they have been earning a tremendous reputation of being extra ordinary actors while my Dad and his friends earn a lot of money but hardly anyone in the world would dare to put their names in the list of great actors. So many better actors among the contemporary lot are not having that kind of commercial success as my Dad and his friends are enjoying.
Perhaps this is all about fate and some people get more success than others who are more talented. But we hope for a better world where talent is recognized and properly utilized.
Am I fearing inside because I know very well that I am going to be a failure in near future?
I don’t know.
But surely I am a sad and confused person today.
I feel this also that I will not be a lone star son who will pass through similar emotions because now exposure is more and many other star sons and daughters will get this awakening.
I do feel that time is still there for my Dad. My Dad can make an entry in to the list of very good actors and hopefully he can enter in to the category of great actors also if he starts doing good films and pays attention to the growth of the actor residing inside him.
That will be the proudest moment for me when I will direct my dad and people will say that I am quite lucky to have one of the best actors of the country in my debut film.
I pray that God should fulfil this wish of mine.
Forgive me Mom, if I have hurt your feelings but I had to express all these things. I was feeling suffocation inside and if I can not open my heart before my parents then before whom?
I have been granted every wish of mine in the past and I sincerely hope that my wish will be granted this time also.
You and Dad have asked me my wish to get a gift on my coming Birthday.
This will be my birthday gift Mom, if Dad becomes ready to do good and meaningful films. There is no dearth of good subjects and good directors.
At this stage of his career he has nothing to lose and he can change the face of Hindi cinema if he wishes to do so.
He gets success or not, it is immaterial for me. If he tries then I am sure he will be able to make some significant changes.
I will respect him more. I will take more proud in the fact that I am son of this Actor. I want to see him in the list of great actors of the world.
Love to you and Dad
Yours confused son
P.S : Ma, You always complain that I dont write you in detail. After finishing this email I am feeling bit relieved. Perhaps I will write you more what I have been thinking these days.
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Disclaimer : Above text is completely fictional in nature and any resemblance to any body may be purely coincidental and hopefully accidental.
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Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
yawn!
@Nilohit,
———–
A Priest dies & is awaiting his turn in line at the Heaven’s Gates.
Ahead of him is a guy, fashionably dressed, in dark sun glasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket & jeans.
God asks him: Please tell me who are you, so that I may know whether to admit you into the kingdom of Heaven or not?
The guy replies: I am Pandi, Auto driver !
God consults his ledger, smiles & says to Pandi: Please take this silken robe & gold scarf & enter the Kingdom of Heaven…
Now it is the priest’s turn. He stands erect and speaks out in a booming voice: I am Head Priest of this famous place for the last 40 years.
God consults his ledger & says to the Priest: Please take this cotton robe & enter the Kingdom of Heaven …..
‘Just a minute,’ says the agonized Priest. ‘How is it that a foul mouthed, rash driving Auto Driver is given a Silken robe & a Golden scarf and me, a Priest, who’s spent his whole life preaching your Name & goodness has to make do with a Cotton robe?’
‘Results my friend, results,’ shrugs God.
‘While you preached, people SLEPT; but when he drove his Auto, people PRAYED’
——————————————-
Happy riding in the Auto
In reality ryan is cribbing that why did srk opt to play surinder..( who is the most uncool looking character in da film…so much for ryan’s sensibilitites..
@anupam,
I have yet to see Rab ne BDJ to know Surinder, you have mentioned.
Is not Shahrukh’s son’s name Aryan (and not Ryan)?
He must be a 10-11 years old kid and certainly will not be able to understand every film his father does or every aspect of his father’s films if he is shown all his films.
He needs 4-5 more years to be included in such discussions.
RK sir,
you are the best hear.
your posts are eagerly awaited, At least by me.
keep writing….
Hey RK, I was planning to write my next post about the established actors who can afford to deviate from the trodden path, but who dont for fear of failure, and not to upset the winning formula, on the same lines that you have so succintly given, though definitely not by way of a mail to Mom (its a masterstroke, according to me…).
Now I think I will have to think of a new topic, coz I dont like being second-best. Keep it up?
PS: I couldnt place the father, however accidental it might be, though I cud sense the ….uncle (RAB bachaye mujhe..)
Keep it up…
@Fultutimepass,
Thanks a lot for your kind comment.
Best possible continous supply will be maintained
@Satyendra,
Thanks for your comment. There is always a scope for a writer to present his writing on a subject and people think differently though on surface it looks that what we are thinking has already been expressed.
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Similar time may come in the life of the children of super stars. With such a nice exposure to the better cinema at very early age, its bound to come and chances, of such incidence to happen, are more in that case where a son or a daughter of a successful star, is going in to the quality filmmaking side as that will have a conflict with his/her father’s way of doing the films which are based on repetitive formulas.
—-
Apart from star sons and daughters, to present quality cinema abroad has been problem of many people. The happiness and confidence we feel while presenting DVD of a Kaghaz ke Phool, Guide, Pyasa, Awara, Mughal-i-Azam, Teesri Kasam, Jewel Theif, Tere Ghar ke Samne, Jhumru, Chalti ka Naam Gadi, Sagina, Sholay, Mausam, Sangam, Mera Naam Joker, Shri 420, Don, Deewar, Trishul, Kabhi Kabhi, Silsila, Anand, Chupke Chupke etc etc (many others) we dont feel while presenting DVDs of contemporary films. With closed eyes we can gift DVDs of films of Shyam Benegal, and great directors of non hindi background. We can count on films showcasing rightly the rich talent of Naseer, Om Puri, Pankaj Kapoor etc but if we have to present DVDs of great films done by super stars of contemporary cinema then we have to really think hard to select which film can match the standard of the films coming from rest of the world.
This is good that this film earned this much amount here and there but then story is finished. After sometime one can attach a label on the DVD that this film had earned millions of Rs or $s. Then only quality of the film will make a grip on the audience.
If only 2-3 films can be said as very good in the filmographies of the super stars then its something questionable thing. and they have control of market in their hands and can do better. They are acting and influencing millions of audiences so there is no doubt in their skills but they dont have courage to do different things which suit their age and maturity level in real lives.
—–
It may be more true to the current time but this situation has been true in every era. Situation was not good when Dilip Saab had done Bairag. He was sensible and sensitive actor hence he opted for self chosen retirement for years before Manoj Kumar forced him to act again in Kranti. But many other super stars have not been able to opt such control.
Is it not starnge thing that during their peak in late 70s and early 80s Both Dharam ji and Mr Bachchan could not do any film with Gulzar saab or a Shyam Benegal or Govind Nihalani. In 80s both super stars did repetitive roles and hence harmed growth of Hindi cinema as well as their own careers also. Dharam ji, continued doing mindless action flicks in 90s also and almost hurted his die hard fans. If we have to remember a Dharmendra film then immediately our minds will transported to the 70s. When Jeetendra ji, made a firm grip on Box office he only did absurd films in 80s. To search quality film in his filmography also we will be going back to 70s when he did 3-4 films with Gulzar saab or in 60s when he did 2 films with V Shantaram.
Mithun became super star in late 80s and started doing Jallad, Dalal, Gunda etc.
These talented actors and all the talented actors who become super stars dig their grave themselves by repeating them again and again.
—-
so ….uncle can be anyone. Father can be anyone.
Though scenario is not completely fictionary and some things are based on a real conversation with someone.
@ RK
Well I would beg to differ with you regarding Big B.I’m not talking about his acting abilities here as I know you havent said he’s a bad actor.What I want to point out is that apart from acting in films of Hrishikesh Mukherjee, he also was the narrator in Satyajit Ray’s Shatranj Ke Khilari
( how many even know that).In the 1970’s he was always able to balance his movies.But it was in the 1980’s when he got stuck into the trap of the bollywood masala.Please remember the 80’s also was the worst phase in Bollywood.And this trend continued in the 1990s & thats when Big B got tired and took a break for 5 years.
Everyone knows that post Mohabbatein & KBC he has been making up for lost time by doing the kind of movies he couldnt get to do in the past.And yes he even did Dev with Govind Nihlani !!!
Welcome Back RK Saab
RK, welcome back. and thanks for this veiled commentary. will read it again to enjoy the flow – before i comment on the subject matter. good to have you back.
This post got me thinking about who was the last big star from a non-film background.
Srk and Akshay Kumar were the only names I could think of and they made their debuts in early 90s.
Ma,
I know my dad is a superstar and he has got many fan who love him. I also know that many of my friends ridicule his movies or at times him too. Even the critics are harsh to him.
.
But I am not ashamed of that fact because I want to believe that whatever role dad did, he did with utmost honesty and integrity. I respect his belief in his cinema even though I am not appreciate the same.
.
Ma, I ask for his blessing that when I start making movies, I do it with conviction and honesty and with a belief in my kind of cinema. It may not appeal to many or none, its OK as long as I can stand by it.
Aapka suputra
.
Yup Satyen,
The uncle is SRK and the Dad is Sunny ?
Or I guess some fictitious star. But interesting thought of line. Can be a good movie subject in itself.
Momma,
Dad has been a superstar and an icon for long. I know Dad started out illiterate, and did a lot of odd jobs to keep the fire burning. Dad was my tough guy, the one who could punch the bad guys on the nose. I felt safe going out with him. But for all his tough guy cowboy and war movie roles, Dad also gave some splendid performances as a slave, a fisherman, a troubled artist.
But to me more than his performances, i admired Dad the way he stood up for his colleagues, refusing to grovel before people, who were paranoid and insecure.
Being Dad’s son, helped me get a much quicker break than others. In fact i was first noticed as a producer of a movie on mental patients, that to date is regarded as a classic. While i did have my share of sleaze stuff, and standard mainstream movies, i also made sure i dabbled in more art house and indie stuff also.
Momma, while being Dad’s son, gave me an edge, it was only to an extent. After that i made sure, i did not end up as Dad’s carbon copy, creating my own identity. I think Dad would have approved of it as he was a self made man himself. Today i acknowledge my gratitude to Dad for making me what i am.
@Sethumadhavan,
Thanks for your comment.
I think whoever has seen Bhuvan Shome, Shatranj KK or Lagaan, must be knowing who has played the narrator there.
I have talked about 80s only with respect to Mr Bachchan and Dharam Ji.
Mr Bachchan has not been a person who could get stuck anywhere if he did not wish to. He has been maintaining that distance and distinction which has been helpful in pulling him out of any circle in a blow.
If he had started repeating his characters in Pukar, Deshpremi, Mard, Khuddar, Coolie, Mahan, Lawaris, Ram Balram, and later after becoming an MP he selected to work in Shanshah, Toofan, Ganga Jamuna Sarswati, Jadugar, Indrajit, Akela etc then these were his own personal professional decisons. Except Coolie none of the film was hit (as per Amitabh Bachchan’s standard in those years, they were hit in comparison to other’s films).
70s had brought a strong position at Box Office for both Mr Bachchan and Dharam Ji and both of them destroyed this advantage in 80s by doing mediocre films. they were in a position to work in selectively good films with good directors and good and new actors. They could have filled the gap between commercial cinema and so called parallel cinema the way Mr Shashi Kapoor had tried. Audiences were mesmerised by Mr Bachchan so most of the time they came out of cinema hall that though film was bogus but our hero was superb as usual. It became individual show. It can not work for long. He was immensely popular so he had capacity to prolong his super stardom for many years, but cinema did not get any enrichment because of his or any other super star’s presence in 80s and 90s. There are moments when history can be made and leadership emerges and super stars of 70s missed this chance in 80s. Hence a long dark phase in Hindi cinema.
Dev is the product of the time when Govind Ji is creativity has also lost the sharpness and intensity which was present in his creative work in early 80s.
I must be the last person on earth who would criticise Amitabh Bachchan’s acting capabilities.
There should be atleast 10 posts dealing with him and his films on PFC.
Key words will carry you there.
I can put up link of one post written on his Birthday in 2007
http://passionforcinema.com/meaning-of-amitabh-bachchan-before-1995-happy-birthday-mr-bachchan/.
I am reading your name first time so If you are new at PFC then please search the archive for posts on AB and his films.
Oh BTW Rk, Lambi Judaai ke Baad phir se, PFC mein aapka swaagath.
@Om, Wb,
Brothers “Gaya Waqt” bana diya kya?
Thanks for comments. More in “more interaction”.
@Vindows, Vishesh,
There is no real super star who came to Hindi cinema from non filmi background in the period mentioned in the post and who could have a son having age around 20.
These things are fictional but happenings may be real. Scenario certainly provides a good starting material for a story/film.
If we go on searching real people in it then message will be lost.
@Ratnakar,
7 Nov-18 Dec, not so long a period.
As usual Some things are same and some things are changed.:)
Thanks for your comments.