Melodrama Is In Our Blood
I have to blog something sooner than later. I have a topic in my mind, but I do not know what to write about it! If I do not post anything over this Christmas period I might get a boot from me boss, yes, even I have a boss. It certainly has put some pressure on me; my eyes keep zooming in and zoom out of focus at speed of light. So it was the time for a Sharabi/Dukhi song. And bang after end of the song another bombshell drops on me; it’s nearly end of the year so filmy people(I mean, my friends who love Hindi Cinema) I know are coming with their top ten films of the year and I so do not agree with their views. This infuriates me; I can hear ‘ghantiyas’ causing havocs in all temples, lightening striking, a gust of wind clatters windows in my room.
Anyway, in amidst of all these events happening in my life I go out to my cousin’s house for dinner. Everyone were sitting in the lounge and were watching a Hindi Film… let’s say the film was unbearable for me. But as a polite guest I sticked around to watch the film even if it meant like torture. I believed that I would be able to soak up all the torture, but it was not to be the case. I got up and shouted (echoed): ‘I cannot watch this crap anymore, so I am going home’, and everyone were shocked. They start banging their heads on the wall; I can hear that crying music – violin/piano and ahaaa ahaaa in the background. On top of that they start saying awful stuff, like: “………”(Ridiculous loud music is being played in the background)
So I come back home; I awake my Apple from sleep and stare at the blank Textedit screen and thinking…. After few seconds I got bored so started reading PFC and surprise, surprise it was possible to see PFC web-page on Safari explorer without everything being linked to Suparn Varma’s web-page; I felt like setting up fireworks! Then I started reading a few filmi forums and this made me more angry that I started throwing everything around in my room and of course, breaking a glass table with my hands. I bled a lot and next minute I know I was in the hospital where I was battling with my life. The top doctor told me ma: “Ab Sab upar waale key haath mein hai” and my ma was like: “Nahiiiiiiiiiiii!” She ran down to the local temple; bare feet, i must add. And she shouted if you do not bring my “beta” back then I will make you watch all the crap hindi movies. Suddenly it started raining, lightening striking, there was a tornado and all “ghantiyas” in the temple going crazy. After few minutes of that sun came out, there was a rainbow in the sky, all divas were alighted by themselves and a flower mala dropped right next to my ma’s feet. She ran back to the hospital where the good news was awaiting for her. She found that I am all okay now even though I have plasters on my both hands/arms and she thanked the doctor: “Aap Bhagwan Ho.” I told doctor that you will have to remove these plasters as I have to get back to writing a blog for PFC, but he gave me an injection to put me asleep. I woke up next morning and I somehow took off all the plaster then jumped out of the window and got home.
I started typing even though I was in pain and bleeding a lot. Then my girlfriend comes; she starts crying, to make her feel better I start singing a song for her and take her to Switzerland, hang on, Australia; it does the trick. I get back to my work and then, my house is surrounded by dozens of polices when I was just about to post the blog. So I go out, exchange a few dialogues and then start beating up everyone, for next 10 hours. I won the battle; I lost so much blood, my hands did not hurt me and yet I am alive. My girlfriend comes running to me, she hugs me and I tell her I have only got few minutes left to post me blog. She brings out her laptop from somewhere and I get to post my blog on time!
The End
Forget about portraying a fiction as real when we cannot even make a true event look actual on the big screen or small screen – Honhaar Goonda
Tags: Television
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
Ha Honhaar, I can safely say from all the witty post enteries I’ve ever seen you write here and in other forums we both contribute too this by far makes it to the top of the list kiddo!
;)
God-dammity-DAMN!
I think you missed the part where your mom is supposed to be coming back from the temple and she has to drop the thali full of prasad and roli.
That’s the “tragedy of versimilitude” for you.
I enjoyed reading that, HG!
)
I loved the bit in which you are at your cousin’s lounge and get up and shout you can’t watch anymore and leave.
Meanwhile HG … how could u ever forget the 2 classic responses of doctors…
1. “Ab inhey dawaa ki nahi dua ki zarrorat hai ” !!!
2. “I am sorry”
Outragously =)) post
By the way … which film was this ???
Well, I had to cut 3 hours film into 2 hours film, and have to leave a bit for the sequel.
Nah, the point is, I was watching a drama called ‘Maan Mein Hain Vishwaas’ on SET and I just could not believe that they portrayed a genuine story as melodramatically – that made it seem so fake. Now why would you do that?
“Now why would you do that?”
Because sadly that’s what sells.
I disagree. The producers believe that it sells and the audiences believe that it’s the only thing on sell.
I agree Honhaar, the audience is used to melodrama as that’s pretty much the dominating tv USP. But as I said, the formula works we like hearing stories like this and touched up with glamour and top names just pushes up the TRP’s.
Maan mein hain Vishwaas comes on Friday’s 8pm right? Never actually got around to seeing a whole episode as it looks too over dramatic for me, If i want to see stories of faith then there are better places to find them then Indian TV Channels.
yup, it comes at that time and i watch it for just laugh. anyway, the point is why have not the audience/filmmakers grown over this format? Surely people would have gotten the jist of what filmmakers are trying to do – it’s not rocket science and hence not liking it.
by the way, use my old-skool screen name Dopey…..
>>anyway, the point is why have not the audience/filmmakers grown over this format?
erm, it works that’s why. If something clicks then you don’t need to recreate magic or be innovative and experiment with your investments.
Without insulting our lovely indian audiences, truth is we don’t accept change easily.
Calling you Dopey is plain insulting, especially to someone as clever as you but still it’s cute so back to Dopes it is :D
@ HG
“The producers believe that it sells and the audiences believe that it’s the only thing on sell. ”
I Like It!!!! Very good point