Money Matters
It’s quite a revolution in my life: the essential urge to learn the art of economics. The filmmaker I look up to is in huge debt. There is no room for romanticism in today’s cinema—not at least with others’ money. The cause of this revolution is my little sister’s illness which is only controllable, but not curable. A revolution doesn’t happen overnight. When I look back, I can see it coming ever since we started to overlook the obvious signs of troubles. Now it has a physical presence, hardly ignorable. There is only one remedy—and that is to learn to live with it.
I never thought doing a film would be an excuse for anything. After five years of ’struggle’ in the Bombay film industry, Ganesh (Dev Pandey) dai was desperate to get back to Nepal to do his own film. He had narrated to me one of his scripts for a short film on the very first night when we had met. I loved the story and felt it could well be a feature film. He needed a sub-plot. I suggested one and he liked it. Meanwhile, we were both supposed to join a television soap in the first week of October but the program got postponed again for 10 days or so. At the same time, Ganesh dai was busy with the post-production of a certain film. I would accompany him at times while the editing of the ‘unfortunate’ film was going on. ‘Unfortunate’ because a copy of My Sassy Girl is already out in Hindi!
My little sister is the evidence of what I am. I can see an exaggerated self of me in her. All my imaginary pain becomes real to her. She is sixteen and more talkative than me! While I was doing ’struggle’ far away in an alien place, my family didn’t tell me about her illness. I happened to know only when her situation became very critical. Nothing could ignite in me that desire to seek lucre before. It seems I was actually waiting for a crisis. After becoming aware of the situation of my bed-ridden sister, I was also feeling guilty for ignoring her completely. I had been looking after my family after my parents started to live separately. Bombay was an end to that for the time being.
Ganesh dai wanted to work for another six months in Bombay to make some money to start his film. He told me that some people were willing to produce his film. However he needed at least some money to do little things. Somehow I convinced him that it would be the same thing with or without that little money. “Let’s go and do it,” I told him one night. The next day we had a meeting with a cameraman who was also willing to help us. And there was a struggling actor in our own flat! We sold his Xbox to return to Ganesh dai’s hometown, Butwal. Some friends liked our decision, some didn’t.
Before coming to Kathmandu, I spent nearly two weeks in Butwal. I met some prominent people of the local film industry there. The situation in the Nepali film industry is so disgusting. Everyone is making movies! What kind of movies? Tsk, tsk. “Directors are only puppets,” a producer told the press the other day. He didn’t agree that making films was a creative thing. He believed anyone could do the mere ‘construction’! He means business, producing eight movies a year on average, hiring so-called ‘directors.’
A producer-director pair, whose film is said to be the highest blockbuster of the decade here, warned us against our current project. Somebody suggested we hire a local AD—one who had even directed movies and was ready to become a director! Some ‘directors’ take credits for films made by their assistants, they said. Name sells. People are really blind. The audiences don’t know what/how to choose. These local ‘construction’-workers are forgiven for making unwatchable films. There’s a huge gap between the urban and the rural population in the country. A majority of Nepali films are still aimed at the rural population. Recently, some new young ‘directors’ have dared to do things differently: They have made remakes of Korean films which have been a huge hit among the urban crowd!
I came home to be with my family before Diwali. I was supposed to write the screenplay for our film. I am yet to put many new scenes on paper. (I just got my sister discharged from the hospital yesterday.) I am supposed to write about cinema for some broadsheet dailies here. There is a need to make people conscious about cinema, a former colleague told me. I am trying to concentrate. I am writing for the first time after my last post on PFC. I am thinking. A friend’s father, a FTII pass out and a renowned actor here, regrets his decision to return to work in Nepal. Quite a similar kind of frustration pushed me out of the country some two years ago.
“What are you doing these days?” an associate editor of a national newspaper asked me today. “Struggle,” the answer now comes naturally to me. I’ve finally become used to it. It’s no more something to be ashamed of. And not yet something to be proud of. People say once you get used to Bombay, you can’t live anywhere else. They are right. I miss Bombay. I really miss it every day. I know what I’ve got myself into. God knows when I’ll be able to return to start a new phase of struggle there. I want to come back to be with friends who have supported me during my difficult days. I will return soon without any complaints! Besides my films are also about India and my own Indian-ness.
Acceptance is the greatest cure of our mental block. There was a guy used to say, “I want to be rich. I want to make films.” I failed to appreciate his theory then, but I do today. Money matters. No money means no films. The formula is simple: If you want to be a filmmaker, it’s vital to better learn to either earn it or steal it. That’s it.
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
Not steal, but con the producer into thinking this is the greatest film ever in a language he understands. Then make the film the way you want to. Thats what RGV says and it makes sense to me.
Anyways, lot of things occupying your mind right now and it shows in the post. Nice of you to take time out to write in here.
wonderful post bro salik. a warm welcome to you. hope your sis gets well soon and you can get bak to your craft. yes, bombay has that effect on people bro, no denying that. money does matter. how much, i am still to learn. hope you make lots of it & soon. touchwood. cake kaato, sab mein baato. viva passion.
nice touchy post Salik.. you are right khel sara paise ka hai..bt keep fighting and u will reach where u want…and my best wishes are with your sister…get well soon…
@ straight from the heart. simply straight from the heart….
Loved your post. I wish you all the best for your future and wish your sis get well soon.
~Ashu Bhai MAPRM wale
Dil phaad diya bro. My best wishes to your sister, miracles do happen. All the best for your return too, hope this time it’ll be easier than before….maybe someday would see ‘Salik Shah’ on the film hoarding while walking on Mumbai streets….a dream come true
Reading on the web has it’s own side effects. One doesn’t quite holds to a long post for long. But your article kept me glued even between constant pestering from here and there. Dude with some creativity thrown in a film can definitely spawn out from your own post. Only on this post. Nothing else. More elements will spoil the pain. My best wishes to your sister, who somehow depicts the struggler, may she gets well really soon. All the best bro
@ salik: i am really touched by your spirit of struggle. its so humbling by what efforts you are putting in to stay afloat.
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may the force be with you, and bring good tidings.
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praying for your sister to get well soon, or as you said it, remain under control for life…!