Monu & Tony on PFC: Satyakalpadroom
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Dear Reader, this is not Magik’s review. This post is jointly written by Monu & Tony. Till date we had submitted hundreds of well-worded and heart-felt posts for PFC, all of which had been ruthlessly rejected. We had to resort to this trick, especially after we got to read the recent post on “One time Superstars“. Now if that post can go up on PFC, what bad had we done to deserve so many rejections? At least our posts didn’t have as many spell-errors!
Happily ever after...
Anyways, Magik being a sucker for free booze, has passed out here, leaving his PFC account logged in and is now dreaming of Cinderella or Red Riding Hood for all we care. Can you imagine, we had written a post about how Anurag Kashyap changed our lives, how much we loved Dev.D… damn we even flew down to Mumbai to be a part of Hansal Mehta’s peace march, hoping that one day PFC will publish our post. Nothing worked. As that didn’t happen & Magik being a friend… well, poor guy, he is ‘Old Monked’ for a few hours.
So about Aladin. Myself Monu & my brother Tony are big time fans of Bachchan Saab & Sanju Baba, so Aladin was on our ‘must watch before we men-o-pause’ list. Add to that Sujoy Ghosh’s 4 posts about the genesis of Aladin & we literally had a tough time waiting days to pass quickly so that on Oct 30 ‘09, we could witness the spectacle and experience how it felt to eat ‘ice-cream with the eyes’.
Well, initially in the movie, Bachchan Saab keeps telling “Aladin, you bore me.” That pretty much sums up how we felt after watching the film. Everything was in place, fantastic visuals, pretty-as-pearl heroine, badass Sanju Baba, good samaritan Bachchan Saab… everything. But Aladin itna bada khajoor kyun hai? Though his parents passed away, his grampa did teach him some cool magik tricks, didn’t he? There was absolutely no reason him to be so big a loser.
Actually, just before passing out, Magik was narrating to us a story he had written ‘Lafda Locha Love’ about a loser and we thought that his story sucked so much that we got him drunk very quickly, even before he reached the interval point. Anyways, that’s what we think went wrong about Aladin. He was too much of a loser to be in a fairy tale surrounded by Bachchan Saab & Sanju Baba. Actually Tony thought that there should have been a love-track between Genius & Marjina, played well by Ratna Pathak Shah. So much for some real flashy potent romance. Magar ye ho na saka…
And who decided on casting that ‘mutton ki dukaan’ who played Qasim? We are glad that he befittingly got to romance the dust-bin. While me & Tony were at the pub after the movie, Tony reminded me of a gift that he had got in his 6th birthday. It was a Cinderella story book. It was heavy like ‘Mahabharat’ but had only 5 pages worth story. Each page was thick like Sanju Baba’s middle finger. The photographs were mind-blowing, with Cinderella in a revealing gown et al. But that’s about it. It would end before it caused a boner.
We think probably that was have been wrong with Sujoy’s Aladin. We wanted to see more of Aladin’s world, which we had just started to like. We wanted to see how Aladin realized that Jasmine is “little bit deewani, thodi crazy”. They hardly had anytime together… when & how the hell did cupid strike Jasmine? She seemed equally happy with ‘mutton ki dukaan’ too! Bouncer tha boss. Anyways, poetic justice ke naam pe maaf kiya baba. To think of it now I am feeling stupid for urging people to watch Alaldin on my Facebook & Orkut.
May be it was supposed to be just a children’s film. May be they out-ran the actual allocated budget. May be too money ruined them. May be Sujoy got over-awed in Bachchan Saab’s prsence. May be we were expecting too much. May be ‘cuz we watched it sober. May be… I dunno what & neither does Tony. All we wanted was to watch Bachchan Saab & Sanju Baba in a never-before avatar, which we did! But the story failed to connect.
Chalo, it was worth the effort, now that we brothers have our name immortalized on PFC. Paisa wasool, ticket ka bhi, Old Monk ka bhi. We don’t mind if Magik kills us once he gets up… badnaam hi sahi, PFC pe naam to amar hua. Arey, rhyme bhi ho gaya! Awesome. Cheerz!
Sorry bro Magik, sincere apologies.
Monu & Tony.
Tags: Aladin review, Big B, Fairy Tale, Mundu, Riteish Deshmukh, Sanjay Dutt, Sujoy Ghosh
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
Monu and Tony need to meet Sirjee and Betelal
Good one!
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Also Sethji and Sarkar
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Sir, please do consider and make us PFC author. We will do our best to bring more fun in ur passion. (oh teri, ye bhi rhyme ho gaya)
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Monu jee, can you tell the Old Monked Magik that you guys write a better review than him
Very heartfelt review, truly!
Please do ask Magik if he could talk about the lafda locha love story next time around.
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Mundu. Absolute Mundu.
P.S. Monu & Tony should hijack Magik’s a/c.
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this is so monu-tonous.
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Nice one Magik !
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oh teri… ye kaise hua? shit man. monu & tony, there will be blood. apologies if this pisses off anyone. it wasn’t me.
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dude, you can take monu and tony out of Magik…but you cant take the magik out of Monu and Tony…its written in BOLD and BEAUTIFUL tht its you, you and you.
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monuly, tonyly, lovely, awesome….
I had great expectations from sujoy….i remember in one of your post on Jhankar Beats..i mentioned tht i owe my advertising career to Sujoy.
But Aladin is another Home (theatre) delivery of disappointments…I am not saying tht all his movies shud be a jhankar…but its he who has created a benchmark for himself….now he will have to move on and strike again…and am sure he will.
But a nice review…Old Monk rocks!!
~Cheers
Ashu Bhai MAPRM Wale.
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Maamu meri jaan!! Only you could have thought of writing under the psuedonym of Monu-Tony!! Bahut Monatoney hogayi thi Magikal reviews padh padh kay!!
About the review, hilarious!! Matlab!! Dammit – leave your comp logged in for Monu-Tony more often!! Loved it! Rocket singh you rock!!
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I think Satyakalpadroom bound the script and never opened it or showed it to anyone
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Monu & Tony-please get Magik high on Old Monk whenever possible ( i.e whenever you guys plan to review a movie
).certainly liked the humorous way of looking @ the movie.The movie certainly had loads of potential.Could have been a cracker with the casting of AB,Sanjay Dutt and Riteish.
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Mast likha baap. Old genie zindabad!! Oops… Old monk zindabad ;)
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Monu, where were you all these years, did that idiot Magik forget to tell us about you and Tony??
Obviously, you have better ideas about films and Sanju Baba’s thick middle finger???????
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ouch! neel da… et tu brutus. apun ka to value ich nahi hai idhar…
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Ye Monu-Tony kya hai, Ye monu-tony…LOL… anyways ki farak… Bolo Old Monk Ki Jai!!!!
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Beautifully written man …
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Actually reminds me, not too long back had written a review for my annual college magazine… generally about the films and the feel that year, and had 2 characters Khalee Maa-ka-math and Current Maa-darsh… and the three of us were supposed to be like Sajid Khan ka Good bad and ugly … wow the look that I got from the council of student teachers heading the magazine committee… for the names…. amazingly never never thought will be on a site someday, where Khalid Mohammad also writes in ….
No offence to you sir.. it was a silly write up then .. and Magik’s post reminded me of those good days when we still have like some creative outbursts instead of today when all day I sit in front of my system!!!!
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Glad you liked the post buddy. “never thought will be on a site someday, where Khalid Mohammad also writes in ….” LOL. Duniya gol hai, har baap ka double role hai!
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“Khalee Maa-ka-math and Current Maa-darsh”
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priceless hai ji… viva paagalpanti
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