My journey from Diamond Talkies To Suleman Scientist’s Lab
It’s at the box office window of Diamond Talkies I realized, that a human wrist is the most supple of all body parts. There was no concept of a queue here, the moment the window would open, the mob would charge, screaming expletives, eyes bulging wide, shoving, jostling, elbowing each other, fists holding crumpled currency and shove their hands into the tiny hole, ten at a time, probably fifteen, clamoring for tickets. Looking back at it, it was not unlike a community glory hole, all sticking their dicks in simultaneously, desperately needing gratification, nirvana in the form of fillums. Pink (sometimes green) and badly printed ‘licenses’ in hand, we would make our way into the hallowed hall, sweating profusely and grinning stupidly from ear to ear. And then, the lights would go off, the audience would cheer lustily.
The proprietor of Diamond Talkies used to own a ghoda gaadi. The stable was adjacent to the far end of the auditorium. I distinctly remember the horse sauntering out and standing right in front of the screen, neighing aloud when Pran set alight a wad of money to keep himself from freezing in the snowcapped landscape. Come monsoon and the theatre roof would leak. Used to be quite disconcerting during action films. The cops would start shooting at daku Kadu Makrani, blood would spurt out from his wounds and in synch, raindrops would fall on us.
Then there was Gulshan Talkies, probably the only theatre in the world where the upper stall tickets would be more expensive than the balcony ones. Fights would break out often, there was bidi smoke all around, the audience would talk back to the screen, it was interactive cinema at its best. By the way, both the theatres have shut down since. 2 minute ka maun dhaaran karein… …
Being a small townie, I thought that the only way to make films was to join FTII. But one had to be a graduate first. I decided to graduate in some related field and joined the painting course at M.S.University Fine Arts College. Four of the best years of my life. Degree in hand, I applied for FTII. Those days the editing course was of two years as opposed to three in direction. I calculated it would be easier to be broke for two years than three and enrolled in the editing course. Glad I did, love to be actively involved in editing of my films. Earlier I would edit them myself, but now I prefer to supervise from five feet behind the console. Dunno why, but I find myself being more objective that way. And if I have a good editor like Hemanti at the console, sone pe suhaaga.
Through with FTII, I marched to Mumbai with Kundan Shah’s phone numbers in my diary (big fan of Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron). The train reached very early in the morning and I stepped down at Dadar only to realize that I had forgotten my jhola and with it, my diary in the train, which was already on its way to Mumbai Central by then. Fortunately I hadn’t put my script of ‘Doosre Type Ki Picture’ in the jhola. I trudged over the bridge to Dadar East, requested a dudhwala to let me use his phone and tried a few permutations and combinations of the number I remembered vaguely. Luckily I got through to Kundan and he called me over. I desperately needed to take a dump. I called out to the watchman through the bars of the Plaza theatre gate and requested him to let me use the toilet. Pehle to na bola, then he grimaced and opened the gates. Its true, Mumbai is a very welcoming city.
Met Kundan at the lift of his office. We got in. He pressed the button. ‘I want to work with you’. He thought I wanted to work as an editor in his serials. ‘No I want to work with you on your feature film scripts’. I think I saw his eyes light up. I had a feeling he will take me on. Inside the office I introduced myself properly and gave him my script to read. He called me back a day later. He had finished reading the script and had a few suggestions. I don’t think he liked it, but he was very encouraging nevertheless. ‘Can I work with you?’ ‘Yes you’re on’.
A few days later I came back to Mumbai, bag and baggage. ‘Where are you putting up,’ he asked. ‘Right now, temporarily at a friend’s place’. ‘If you want, you can stay at my office’. It was that simple. Not only did I have a job, but also a flat to stay. Kundan, thanks boss.
I worked with him on various scripts. There were days when we were very productive, and days when we couldn’t write a single line and days when we fought. Of the scripts I worked with him on, Loveria got shelved before reaching the finishing point but Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa made it to the theatres. Sure, technically I’m the co-writer of the story and screenplay, but its Kundan’s baby.
Was itching to do something on my own. I submitted my script of ‘Moon Moon Sen’ to the Children’s Film Society of India. On my way back, on the bus, I began thinking maybe ‘Moon..’ isn’t the right project, though a good script, it’s a slow moving modern fairy tale… let me write something more masaaledar. I immediately went about writing the script of ‘Sunday’. Well, ‘Moon…’ got rejected but ‘Sunday’ was on. It is a comic adventure I shot in Saurashtra with Ratna Pathak Shah, Imaad Dalaal, Shrivallabh Vyas, Ashish Vidyarthi, Deven Bhojani, Rakesh Bedi and others in 10 days.
Urf Professor was shot in 13 days, Cape Karma in 22 and now Sankat City, in around 30 days. Not bad progress I must say.
Back to Sankat City – ‘Nahi ji, jimmy jib to naheen de paayenge’, said the production controller with a smile on his face. I needed one for a shot of the ball rolling into the camera in the bowling alley shoot. Luckily, we had brought long rubber mats as we were not supposed to walk on the smooth floors.
I had no choice but to make do with the most archaic of dolly shots. A mat was laid, on which the cameraman crouched holding the camera with the focus puller sitting on him. Behind this mat, was laid another one, on which stood the assistants. As soon as Faujdaar let go off the ball towards the camera, the assistants began pulling the cameraman’s mat and the others standing on the side began rolling the mat behind. And just as the ball was about to hit the camera lens, the focus puller stuck his hand out and stopped it. It worked like a dream, well, not exactly like a dream but we got our shot.
I shot Sankat City on super 16, mainly because of budget constraints, works for me as it’s a film shot from the hip, the grains add to the grittiness. Sethji is upset about the grains though. So these days I’m spending sleepless nights at Suleman Scientist’s Lab. Sankat City is going to be the first film for which vaseline swathed glasses are going to be distributed to the audience for eliminating the grains. Wear them at your own risk…
Just kidding.
Lou Brock once said – No one wants to hear about the labor pains, they just want to see the baby.
I don’t know who Lou is but I do agree with what he said. No more talk about Sankat City related labor pains… … probably later, after the film is released, it will make juicy reading!
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
“No one wants to hear about the labor pains, they just want to see the baby” that was cheeky huh!!
neverthless article was really nice spcly the introduction part.
Brilliant…We really want to hear more about the foreplay, copulation and labor details too…all of us here like biology…filmi one though :-)
Cape Karma posters are too good…
Aiiyye saala..awesome blog again. What is Cape karma?
Nice read !
wrist, diamond talkies, plaza, vaseline swathed glasses — :-)
Want to desperately watch ‘Urf Professor’.
Had read a great review by Oz sometime back.
Just wanna say… I am a huge fan of Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa’s writing. Hats off for that work!
I vaguely remember reading somewhere that it was inspired from a novel. Is is true ?? If yes, please throw some light on this.
Also if possible, Share your memories with Kundan Shah.
Regards!
@Harsh – the starting point was a book. Kundan would be the best person to throw light on it. he has a blog here, let’s all knock at his door and ask him to talk about the film.
@Om – cape karma translates as celluloid gathering dust on shelves. its a surreal psychological thriller, atleast that’s what I think.
@Ram – biology=can of worms.door hi rehte hain us se. :-)
@futurefilmmaker – introduction ke saath saath climax bhi achcha hona chaahiye. will try harder.
@satya – oz has been really good to urf.
In my town ranchi there are 2 main theatres sujata and sandhya and the experiences were pretty much the same like u. Luckily no eulogies here as they very much exist for nostalgic quotient. I still go there sometime. Which town u grew up in? Also I must say that Boss i admire ur guts and passion for movies. Your struggle to achieve ur dreams and conviction is inspiring. btw what became of “Doosre type ki picture”. also apki baki filmein- are they available on dvds. Will u realease them theatrically or on television? do tell as I would like to see them. Thx for sharing ur experiences with us.
hi reposting just in case u dont follow up on your first blog comments.
Bhai for a first timer even co-writing with a director of calibre of kundan shah is a tremendous achievement. that too kabhi haan kabhi naa. I really feel it is his best work after jaane bhi do yaaron. So bro u deserve all the credit and accolades u are getting. Kundan is a mAassive Film-maker and already has his place under the sun.Its high time u get yours. So no justifications needed and required. Its great enough accomplishment to work with Kundan Shah and when he let u Co-write it automatically becomes ur baby too. So accept the praise in all humility and make some great movies for us.
Really curious to know about “Moon Moon Sen” and you say fairytale children’s film. With that kind of a name I can only imagine an Indian “Malena” with Moon Moon 20 years ago. I will definitely need that “Vaseline” Sir to watch this
When you say you shoot films in a week to a fortnight to a month it really tugs and hurts my nuts when I hear of students from NY Film Academy coming to India and spending a good few lakhs in Indian currency to shoot “short” films in much more time and having Arri 535s on sets. No one cares about the labour indeed.
You epitomize PFC’s true sprite with no pretense. “BAKCHODI” Love the name of your blog . No pretense, 100% passion
Iss Bakchodi mein dum hai
(Say it like Rajendra Guptaji “Iss cement mein jaan hai”)
Pankaj awesome post. I used the blanket dolly myself on a short a month ago. Worked like a charm.
@Fu man chu
Whats your objection to money being spent on student films ? Do you think they are less worthy of commitment. I’ve been on student film sets where we have shot on anything to a Arricam to Super8 and minidv. If a student can afford it then more power to them.
Making movies in just 10-30 days is simply amazing….God knows how do you manage it….
Now that u have Moser Baer on board, are u looking for releasing earlier flicks in DVD format…specially looking forward to Urf Professor…
And even I don’t know who Lou is, but I disagree with him, reading about the labour is as much fun as the baby itself…so keep it coming !
Loved the post, but amazed by the Posters beside the post, amazing stuff, who made it and it tells me a lot about the movie and its psycho stuff!
Hi Pankaj good to see you here. Hope you remember me. Sankat City sounds just like the man himself. Never ever bowing to conventions…just led by his own convictions. Wonderful…waiting to watch as soon as it releases.
Hey Pankaj..read in the comments section of the other post of yours that the trailer is out on youtube? If so can you please post it here, couldnt find it there? Thanks. And keep blogging.
Cape Karma seems intriguing .. how can we catch hold of that?
hey pankaj, absolute fun read. Diamond Talkies is a representative of the numerous theatres in mid-80s andearly 90’s when almost everyone had to endure this kind of mobile-wristplay… so much nostalgic, and so much hitting on the head…
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any chances of knowing more abt ur earlier movies, and probably watching them?
Pankaj- nice post which enables to gain a lot of insight into your filmy journey.Keep writing & enlighten us more on your journey.
Mitch – just dont want them to pamper themselves so soon:) Its not my money anyways but its astounding to know someone of the caliber of Pankaj Advani is not able to raise that kind of money and has to listen to a Production Manager say “Nahi ji, jimmy jib to naheen de paayenge”.
“Manjha” was made in Rs.60,000. With motorcycle and car headlights.
My question is where are these “EXPENSIVE STUDENT FILMS?”. Who has seen them? are they as good as the money being spent on it? or are they just the filmmaking counterparts of Jacky Bhagnani.
Power to all Mitch, I do agree.
A friend of mine was an AD on one such OBSENELY budgeted student film. Script? She said “shit”. Maybe I am being too judgmental.
Maybe I am just being a leftist. (oops!!!! they too are out of power)
Maybe I am just plain pissed that Panjak Advani cannot shoot his film in that leisure as the “Loaded” students.
I am amazed seeing a Vanity Van and a Jimmy Jib just lying around on standby for a student film when…..
Sour Grapes I guess
I rub some sugar on my toungue 
@Dr.Fu Man Chu – nice nick. itna dukhi mat ho, it was a toss between making the film in 30 days or hawking the script some more, i chose the former. mitch is right, if one gets a big budget, go grab it and make the film. tell me more about manjha?
@Indraneel – 1st 2 poster designs are by sukant panigrahi, a hotshot art director now.
@Cherish – no idea about the u tube trailer. oz has a few, he’ll put them up on in due course.
@Nirad – abbe saale, kahaan hai? we’ve spent hours together editing my shorts for channel v.
@Sudhir – didn’t shoot them in quick out of choice, but i ain’t complaining either. :-)
@Nisheeth – will make ‘doosre…’ some day. will try and be immodest henceforth. )
@all – no dvds of earlier films. could try and have a screening at a later date.
Pankaj – On “Manjha”
http://dearcinema.com/indian-short-film-manjha-in-slumdog-blue-ray-disc/
And I would really like to really compare this to any expensive NY film.
@Fu man chu
If you are basing your judgement on one badly made student film then you are being way too harsh. Not every film is good or even decent. As far as to who has seen these films, they win awards at festivals and get their directors signed on with agents and get them movie deals. Some even get adapted into features. This year’s best film till now “Sin Nombre” was adapted from the director’s 2nd year NYU film. As to where they get the money, not everyone has a trust fund to fund their films. Most of the stduent films get made through student loans, scholarships and raising money from friends and families. As you very well know loans have to be repayed, scholarships need to be earned and charity is always iffy. Nobody gets a free lunch in this world. Student films run the gamut of budgets as do feature films. The last film i worked on had a budget of 2k while the one I’m working on at the end of the month has a 50k budget. The 2k one might turn out to be the better film but that’s another story.
Pankaj – Thanks for the post… would love hear more about tradeoffs you made while shooting and what worked and what didn’t.
Fu Man Chu – Why be annoyed at student films? Let’s look at all the tripe that gets produced in Bolly and Holly for millions of dollars!
And if you want an Indian example, Loins of Punjab was Manish’s thesis film for NYU too…
Fantastic post once again. Please do write often. Your posts are much better than the recent posts on PFC. We need more like these. I would like to know more about your film Cape Karma and where I can see it.
lovely post! chhaa gaye sirji… u just got urself another devotee.
@Fu man chu – mitch has lobbed the ball in your court! nice writeup on manjha.
Hey Pankaj…I know the problems that you faced first hand…but it speaks a lot about your abilities that you managed to make such a fine film inspite of the hindrances…we’re all looking forward to the film, Kulla, Aswini, all of us. Am sure it’ll do well
Don’t have a good tagline for the posters. Guys, Any suggestions?! Need it ASAP!! Can’t provide more info at the moment except for the 2 posts.
Tag lines never made any sense….so a few senseless suggestions
“Sin is not Sinister enough – Sankat City”
“Sankat se no Vimochan – Sankat City”
“What you call hell, we call it home – Sankat City” (ok, this is straight from Rambo)
“Do ya feel itchy, jhand? – Sankat City” (this was really bad, I agree, Dirty Harry my just pull one on me)
yeh Mitch gave it right on the nut
comment removed on Author request
@Arthi – Cheesy Trailer, Bad Synopsis! guys, check them out at your own risk!!
Hmmmm…Is it…np…tx for this discl Pankaj…do you want the links taken off from here?…will check on that thn…
no worries Arthi, i’ve handled worse embarassment. :-)
got that…:)…
Dear Pankaj,
I dont think u need a tagline. the short and succinct title is more than catchy. why waste it with adding cheesy stuff?
@Nisheeth – you’ve got a valid point!
@Shiv – cheers guys.
Pankaj, reading about your early forays into fillum line is really inspiring! I am very much looking forward to Sankat City but the poster design of Cape Karma really caught my eye. Watching the trailer thru Arthi’s link it gave an impression that the poster was glossed up unlike the film’s overall feel and look. And any movie buff would already have a fair idea about the movies twist after watching this trailer. The moment I saw the trailer and saw Rahul Dev as the lead I instantaneously imagined him to have a look similar to leads in Memento or The Machinist, if you catch my drift! Overall kudos to you, you are officially on my list!
@Markiv – i agree, its a pathetic trailer. 1st 2 poster designs are actually very much in synch with the film though.
@Oz – trailer contains spoiler (also reminds me of the asshole who must’ve cut it!).
The posters of Cape Karma are mindblowing…No way of it getting released?..
For a second, the poster of Cape Karma reminded me of Marilyn Manson’s album cover Mechanical animals but it’s pretty awesome. The third poster was sort of weird for me. Seriously tell us what’s it all about, intriguing it is.
@Anindya – hope it does get released ’some day’.
@Neeraj – 3rd poster doesn’t work for me, was done at the behest of producers. will write about the film some day.
I am really hoping to see Cape Karma.All the best Pankaj.
A children’s film called ‘Moon Moon Sen’??!!! LOL!
@Pankaj:Great to know about your early days.
But unless I know how to get hold on ” Urf Professor ” and see it, reading about it is like this KLPD story-
A girl called and asked ‘Come over, no one’s home’. I went and no one was home.
@Uh – you should’ve vamoosed with the tv, dvd player and the refrigerator. will try and organize a screening sometime.
Thanks, Pankaj.
I am just a guest writer @ PFC, so would really feel obliged if I can attend the screening.
@UH – no screening without udta haathi!
hi pankaj
i really like your style of making films
i loved your movie urf professor
and i want to watch it again but i cant find you
can you please help me
how do i get this movie ?