One Whiskey, One Masala Dosa – The QGM Fan Club
circa 1994
“We are like this only” - Quick Gun Murugan(Channel V)
circa 2008
“… and the Indian Cowboy who may become the greatest of all… Quick Gun Murugan, if at all it gets released! ” - Oz
circa 2009
“Vegetarianism is the need of the hour“- Quick Gun Murugan(Quick Gun Murugan-Misadventures of an Indian Cowboy-The Film)
And we are pretty strict this time.
Let me repeat the last time –
PURPLE SHIRT & CHIN ALWAYS UP are ESSENTIALS. Zero tolerance on the list. Not open for financial negotiations or carnal persuasions.
“Come out I say”
“Remove your guns I say”
“Agar tu lightening hai, to main 250 volt current I say”
Rascal, main sikhayega how to behave(to Gun Powder)
Need not to worry ebey gede(abey gadhe), main correspondence se seekh loonga(Gun Powder to QGM)
What Mind it?! You never mind what I have to say(Mango Dolly to QGM)
“Main tere pe Google kiya hai, Rice Plate!”(QGM in a mixed emotion of furious fit of anger and confusion, to Rice Plate Reddy)
“Hold your horse!” - Maharashtra State Road Development Corporation to QGM, July 2009(Concerned Department Ministry not available for comment)
So you speak Tamizh?
Uh…little little. …basically…I am a Mumbai Girl.
SPACE GODDESS
O little flower….look at the weather aaouutside dear, isn’t it handsome. I am taking back to early times, when you are fresh like daisy, and I am young like new film poster on Friday eve.
Rukmaniye….LOOK AT ME!
Want a loving wife, who loves me all year. One Dosa & Whiskey on the rocks! No Soda, Dosa, MASALA DOSA I say!
Vengeful Space Goddess….the 100 watt lady in the club.
Diva in the office. Where did you keep my file. Don’t feel shy. I see. Diva appears divine. Blow cold.
It’s a private road. Is there any parking for outsiders?
There is echo on my end, can you hear me?
You are serving goddess of music. Want to make any offerings to this, devotee?
I see.
Trance in a head. Head in a trance.
Flower strength. Flower power I say.
O little flower….
Don’t go don’t leave me…
May be in the next birth.
No! No! In this birth. In this birth….
…….. ………
Don’t go! Don’t leave me!
(sobs like a junior artist in his moment of glory)
……………………….
She was my would-be. Now she is no more.
And this is how I first won her heart, and she gave me her hand for life…
I am the Cowboy from Madras
Walking on the cruel grass
Take my hand you will not fear
In these arms you will fit dear
(sobs like an art film actor, in hope of an award he will never get)
“Eat my dosa, or die!”
EK THA MURUGAN
Sometimes Noir is not NOIR enough, but may be it becomes ever-so-deeply ultra-noir by that process.
Oh no! these are the men from the electricity board. Not the robbers. Poor souls, they sure look like robbers.
I am writing my own mortuary. Can’t trust any one in this ironical world you see. Friends turn foes as you digest your Pav Bhaji.
Sometimes they play retro music here. They don’t have many songs but the ones they have make up for the ones they don’t.
Blood looks best at sundown, so that gives us around 5:35 for the shoot.
Rum boom rum boom.
Don’t look back, for if you her sweating from the neck, you might grow sympathetic.
These are no big setbacks, Vijayan. You should hear about the time I was with Shadow Fog Detective Agency. First of all, I never met Mr. Rajagopalan in the eye. He disgusted me, with his fake idealism, and forced discourses. Once we were at this hunt for a serial killer who disguises himself into waiters with beards and doubles up at bars as malnourished bouncers. So that night we were at Dragon Kiss Bar, and it had this huge jukebox. Like the one they show in the Michael Jackson video. Only, this one played Tamizh songs. Not that it does not go with the late evening mood though. And there was this suspicious man in tight t-shirt, looking uncomfortable pacing around the jukebox.
-CUT-
NAAM MERA MANGO DOLLY, I AM THE LADY ROOMBA JOLLY
Dolly had sung these songs before. When Quick Gun was still a Young Gun, more of a Bubble Gun at that.
How to whistle I say! He often pondered gazing at those half torn posters near Jubilee Theater.
PETER PANDYAN on Bass
“Excitement welled up in me immediately soon after he set his fixed fox like gaze on me. It was exciting…”
They had once gone to the Cabaret Bar,
Any boyfriends?
No.
Any Romances?
No.
Naughty I say!
VAMP
Kisi ki bhi hai na maine suni
Apni kahaani bhi khud hi buni
Look mera Fair ‘n Lovely
Mera dank mein zehar hai
I am a lady roomba jolly
Sweet toffee like a lolly
Sabki neendein maine udaali
Not that they were allowed or anything…
CHAT MANGNI PAT BYAAH LOVER
I am tired of killing rascals now
Rukmani, let’s go to the film
Tonight special show for you and me.
All these sorry days, too many rascals talk about fiction and pulp fiction and what not. I tell you my dear Sunitha, the only fiction I have heard of is susy-fiction. When Saucy Susy dances in the Island Bar, I sing with whiskey in my hand, and Susy smiles at me.
Shoot first, talk later!
She wrote to him the third time. It was short this time…
Remember the day I told you about the afternoon dream I had when my parents were at home. It was a Sunday I guess. You and me were stranded in this strange forest where there were only flowers. And all of them marigolds. The fragrant flowerbeds of marigold, and a private boat, made of marigold….
-CUT-
VILLIAN
It was around 2 years ago that I experienced a similar high. Digging these original 100% Indian scores, and getting lost in that world. Johnny was one. Though sadly sidelined by the beat-heavy title song and the floor-friendly Doob ja mere, the score had gems from Daniel B. George. It brought an era in front of your eyes. This sounded like someone knew what was going on in the studio, the sounds were carefully chosen with all the love, that makes something like this an affair to remember.
This song actually follows a tripartite structure, spanning three decades in the three versions, from OP Naiyyar to quintessential RD Burman of Naseer Hussain era to the Rajesh Khanna freewheeling songs from films like Mere Jeevan Saathi and Kati Patang. A special mention for the lyricist Swanand Kirkire who does full justice to the big challenge of recreating an era of song and dance.
The ultracool factor is that these are original songs yet sound like classics, from the very decades in film music that they represent.
QGM was always on the cards but musically, expectations were low. But now that’s changed so.
KUCHI KUCHI TWIST
Please once again!
Rukmaniye..chance nahi le
sabka hai man
bas ek chumban
Rukmaniye….ye kissi ye na de.
Guitars. Funky Asha Parekh beats.
Kuchi kuchi se kuch na ho agar bas ye samjho
Bin reasons se pyaar karo
Rukmani will say hello.
Please…once again!
Rukmaniye…(repeat till you reach the stanza)
Main pyaar jatata hoon
main mani dikhata hoon
flower bhi laata hoon
usey drive karaata hoon
Kuchi kuchi bhi karta hoon…
want to make family with you only Rukmini.
LOOK AT ME!
Rukmaniye…(repeat the para para para till you reach stanza(!))
(Some classic gender/literal confusion happens here. I won’t reveal it.)
‘When This Key Sketch Gets Real Tongue is Fork Hen is Cock When This Key Sketch Gets Real My Baby Eagle’s Dream Comes True’- A collection of black and white drawings by Natesh, features in The Blaft Anthology Of Tamil Pulp Fiction(Pritham K. Chakravarthy)
KYUN KEEDA HAI AAPKO
Bak bak hai aapki sunli
Kis khet ki aap hain mooli
Tedhe sawaalon ke hain tedhe jawaab
Miyaan na biwi raazi
Phir bhi lage hain quaazi
Itne asmanjaz mein hain kyun janaab
Kyun janaab…
Kyun janaab…
Take it over, Jazz Mridangam.
Baldies are allowed for one hour, starting now.
The beat came late. I told you last time one more mistake and we will sound like a bad orchestra at a cheap marriage hall.
But whatever you say, a party should be like Pandian’s anniversary party at his Adyar bungalow. Sparkling white wine on the house, and appams & fish curry on order.
Karambhoomi mera aangan hai
Terrace mera ye neel gagan hai
Ye poora duniya mera watan hai…
The Casting
Rajendra Prasad as Quick Gun Murugun
Anu Menon as Locket Girl
Rambha as Mango Dolly
Nassar as Rice Plate Reddy
Raju Sundaram as Rowdy MBA
Ashwin Mushran as Dr. Django
Shanmugarajan as Gun Powder
VENDETTA
Acknowledgement:
Blaft
Channel [V]
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
Arrrei makki kirkiri,,,jhakaaas…read a few lines and found this
“What Mind it?! You never mind what I have to say(Mango Dolly to QGM)”
Its not Mango Dolly..she is QGM’s childhood sweetheart…
Now will read the whole article, i say!
Wokay, ya he has two potti tracks in the film.
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Dosa Dosa Whiskey Whsikey Hat hat Horse Horse Pulp Pulp Leone Leone Django Django.. I’m seeing double. I’d like to see more later today.
You outdid it man. Take a bow but watch your back. This is dynamite.
This one’s for many a lost causes my man. You know ‘em all.
“I’ll have what he is having.”
he he, Tejas. cheers!
bakbak hai aapki padh li
kis khet ki aap hain mooli?
Exclamation Mark.
QGM is intoxicating and you have spilled all the gems out of the bag
Tum agar QGM fan, to main 12 ton split AC, I say!
Sooper pichchar!! Whoever said it’s dark n shit. I never laughed so hard at the movies in recent years. Keep ‘em coming.