Ramu, ab phoonk de…
A monkey. A giraffe. An onion. A soft toy. A lemon. A soft ball. They have all moved court to get a stay order on Ram Gopal Varma Ki Phoonk. Their claim: they have not been credited in the beginning or end of the movie. “After all we are the main characters,” says On Ion, whose appearance shot in the film is a staggering close-up filling up half of the cinemascope screen.
The monkey and the giraffe have gone to Maneka Gandhi. “We are not extinct as the film would want everyone to believe,” says Mon Key. Adds Gi Raffe: “We were promised that some point in the film we would all come alive and have a blast.” But in Ram Gopal Varma’s Phoonk everything stayed as dead as a dodo. Only the camera is on viagra and the background score has an extreme case of diarrhoea.
But what takes the cake is the kauwa. Straight out of Madam Tussaud’s. It looks real but it doesn’t move or caw. Maybe the black magic spell was cast on it too. It just rests on the branches more like a pigeon incubating its eggs. And I forgot about the owl, who sleeps at night.
And the objects which do move in Phoonk, move too much. The grandmother’s head keeps moving like nobody’s business. Yes, it’s a disease and there are people around who have that disease but on screen it’s irritating at best. Then Zakir Hussain’s tantrik, he moves his eyeballs in such corners of the eyes, I didn’t know they existed. The kid, of course, has to fly around in different parts of the room defying Newton’s theory. Sudeep, who is Jaaved Jaaferi two generations lost, blinks his eyes so many times, he wouldn’t ever be considered for a contact lens ad.
The friends of mine whom I dragged to watch Phoonk on a lovely Saturday night was thinking of sequels to Phoonk. Thook, Soonkh, Bhookh… No, Ramu they were not laughing to ease their scare. They were not scared. At best they were worried about their ears because the grating background score was really deafening and you should really put up some kind of disclaimer about in in the beginning. People may actually lose their hearing skills. And as a result their balance. Something you have obviously lost.
Yes, you stop laughing at times and just think what is wrong with the man… Why are all of his characters in the last so many films such pathetic caricatures? Why can’t he write a character anymore? Strange because the same man gave us Munna and Bhiku and Uma Parvati. Even Chako was an exaggerated character but it was never seen on screen before, not a horrendous caricature revisited a zillion times in the worst of Ramsay movies.
There is just one moment in the two-hour ordeal when there is a scratch of a scare. In his nightmare, Sudeep looks into the mirror, he turns around, the mirror image doesn’t. There was a South Korean horror film in 2003 called Into the Mirror which is entirely about lives on the other side of the mirror and that’s now being remade in Hollywood starring Kiefer Sutherland in the lead. But yes, that one moment in Phoonk really had me sitting up.
Ramu chacha, you blame Anurag Kashyap for going back on his words and casting John Abraham whom he had found a non-actor earlier. And what are you doing? You write in your blog about how it feels good that Phoonk is making pots of money. Didn’t you tell me a week before that you are not bothered how much money your film makes and all you are interested in is a comment from the viewers.
Well, here is my personal comment for you, Ram Gopal Varma: Ab cinema banana chhod de… Ab tu phoonk de…
P.S. I hope there doesn’t come a day when RGV has to pay Rs 5 lakh to make people watch his movies. Alone or otherwise…
Tags: Phoonk, ram gopal varma, rgv
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
rgv’s camera has been on Viagra ever since nishabd.
but i still believe RGV is going to bounce back….he is gonna hit rock bottom ( if he hasnt hit rock bottom already that is ) and then he is going to stand up tall…
the media film he talked about in his blog seems interesting….hopefully he will come back
RGV has said that since the content of some of his films are not ok, people are finding problem with the craft. I agree with him but only to a certain extent(the BGM in his films are becoming noisier and noisier, how beautifully he used to exploit silences, what happened to that craft?). As far as the camera work is concerned, it was fantastic in Phoonk. What did not work is the striking similarity to Bhoot in terms of format.
The movie was not scary, but worked quite well as a thriller in the second half. Performances were good, including the over the top Manja and Madhu.
But why he is losing his grip on the script? Shiva 2, Aag, Sarkar Raj, Contract and now Phoonk…the script is weak in all these films(Sarkar Raj had a potentially good script but needed more and more rewriting). How I wish some smart producer goes to RGV after finalising the script, instead of RGV thinking about and idea, asking some guy to write the script on the basis of his idea and making a mess out of it.
zoombash,
there are a lot of frustrated people here who find some solace at pfc as they find no other place to vent their frustrations!! unfortunately RGV becomes their punching bag on many occassions..they just like to hate him!
& some people like to think they are the mayanks, khalids, masands, nikhats, gehlots, jhas, etc. of the film industry..they have an opinion on everything, but what have they done? NOTHING!!
Yes yes we are all on drugs, all out of work and Phoonk is the greatest film ever made… Hila?
Ha ha!!
Pratim,
Nothing moved in ‘Bhoot’ too, but then nothing moved in ‘Veerana’….so, you know the difference….
Bottom line…if u have decided that RGV is not a good film maker….jus keep it to yourself dude…coz we know he can make stuff differently…and he is proved again with Phoonk…he can just phoonk away unwanted & unknown critics…lol…really so funny to read your take on phoonk….U must be a great director….a REAL hidden talent…just for once….only once dude…HOLD THE CAMERA….AND YOU WILL KNOW!!!
hhahahaha….suberb one Pratim! i cud not dare to watch it alone or even in houseful theatre! so is Ramu singing…yeh kaala kawwa kaat khayega…yeh kaala….yeh kaala….or is it some black magic at boxoffice! and yes yes, its true he is planning a sequel!
@Sridhar oley oley oley…
@phoenixu, people are watching phoonk in UP he says in the blog… lol… he has got hold of the himesh audience… ha ha ha
Pratim.. So what if a bad film does well in UP? A director tends to get elated when his film does well. Why ridicule him for that?
Because Anand he takes pride in it… If you ever meet him, you would know how nonchalant he can be when his films flopped… as if he never cared… as if it never matters… but now that Phoonk’s opened well, he is singing a different tune…
Hilarious Pratimda!
But the news of a sequel is too scary. Scarier than this one!
Fatema, Soonkh isn’t a bad option for the sequel with Manja sniffing his way to the corners of the house…
“If you ever meet him, you would know how nonchalant he can be when his films flopped”
I would appreciate that actually..instead of sulking and crying…i would prefer him to be rock solid and keep making movies..if he gives duds..well everyone does, he does more…but, should that deter him? for most it would, not for him…and there lies his passion..i persoanlly like the attitude..and everyone is happy if his movie is a hit…whats wrong in it? End of it..everyone feels bad for a flop film and elated for a hit film..its just he is not showing emotions for his flop films…the sooner we accept this trait in his personality..the sooner, will get over be-rating him and every given oppurtunity
You dont get my point OM… he stopped being nonchalant because a few people in UP are watching the film… What does that mean? The nonchalance was a show!!
I dont get elated when bad movies make a lot of money… Sorry I dont… I dont support Kya Kool Hai Hum, I dont support Singh is Kinng, I dont support Phoonk…
Well, here is my personal comment for you, Pratim gupta
” Ab tu RGV ki picture dekhna chhod de “
Yes PDG…i know its a show…and he is selling bytes for the media..everyone is happy..thats what i was telling..we know he puts a show..the sooner we accept…the sooner, will we start appreciating or criticizing RGV’s film than RGV, that almost everyone is doing these days
@ashwin… let me reply to you in RGV style… pehle tu mera blog padna chhod de…
@OM, I liked Darling… but Phoonk was the pits for me, coming from the maker of Raat… I have nothing to do with RGV the person when I am watching a film made by him… I didn’t write about him, I wrote about his film…
People here have a feeling that this review is the PFC point of view and kind of taking out their anger on me… It is not… It is my point of view and I am an admirer of many of Ramu’s earlier films… My first post on PFC was about what a huge promoter of fresh talent RGV is http://passionforcinema.com/rgv-ki-aag/
Every film of his I would go and hope I would like it and be so disappointed… It’s just a personal angst friends…
@ Fair enough PDG..but, what confuses me is you talk about the movie and the man..the non-support is for the movie and to an extent to the man…
It is an idividual call to support a movie or not..to watch it or not…but, then you ask him to retire..to phoonk de…well..now arent you getting personal with him?
Yes, I don’t want him to become a Dev Anand re… I don’t want him to become a Mahesh Bhatt… I love him and that’s why I hate him… When the man becomes the movie, it can either be terrific or terrible… Sadly for me it was the later…
Totally undersatnd…i felt the same after Sarkar Raaj :-)
havent seen Phoonk though…but, i am happy his two movies recently are hits..sarkar raaj and phoonk..though i didnt like SR…and he very well knows…these two movies probably arent anywhere close to being good…he needs a script for christs sake…the idea the mindframe..they i dont think will work from now on…
I personally feel he gets so obsessed with a one-line idea, he doesn’t flesh it out… So, the film searches for a story to hang on to and that’s not there and so the technique takes over, which cannot be the same for a comedy, a thriller, a family drama and a horror film….
Chets, that’s what Anurag has said right from the beginning of his blog. He has always maintained exactly what you quote. So, not sure if you have not been following his blog or this is all mischief about “singing a different tune”….
People here should get real. What sells is great. If Ramu tried some gimmiks to sell his movie, he has every right to do so. Whatever anyone says, one is always bothered about money.And if good comments come, then its a bonus.
Pratimda is disappointed because he expects great work from RGV,which did not come.
I used to be disappointed with Mahesh Bhatt after seeing his bad films as i expected him to make movies of the calibre of Saransh. After some time i gave up.You know some people just deliver one great work of art and fade away.But they remain great never the less.
May be its time to move on and look for a new kid on the block.
Exactly my point Sushovan… On PFC it has always been about the cinema… If we were here to celebrate box office collections we might as well be businessofcinema or bollywoodhungama or whatever…
@Pratim
Whatever you reply means…But, I really feel the right to comment on someone’s hardwork on a public level should be entitled only to the one who is qualified enough…who has been there, seen everything and done that sucessfully!!(Atleast to some degree)….we will agree to him!!…and if a Film fares well….and majority like it…its better for amateurs(In this case I guess not even close to it) to behave accordingly….you are contradicting yourself by telling that YOU ARE NOT GETTING PERSONAL…DEAR PRATIM…..you did that in your comments….anyone would tell that…you should have decided that before you wrote your comments….if you like him as much as you hate him….or vice-versa….your way of commenting would be entirely different….Coz WE know that…we have been fans of RGV since ‘Shiva’…..we like and feel his work….after making such a debacle like AAG, how many directors do you think will make atleast this much…I say atleast….coz you have degraded him to the core….and we frankly DONT like it!!!
entertaining read Pratim da…
cant muster enough courage to even download the film now.
will save the bandwidth for better stuff :-)
pratim,
if you have any talent for writing & feel so much for RGV and how he should have made PHOONK,etc.then why dont you write PHOONK 2? just take part in the contest & maybe your story gets selected and you win rs.10 lakhs!! common go for it..everyone at PFC will support you..
Pratim: I was quite shocked to see you reveal an important scene without putting a spoiler alert. You call it the only scary scene in the film and spoil it for others by revealing it!! Not done.
Too much hai baap…main scene aisa nahi likhna yaar…woh ‘Raja Sen’ aise ich ‘Race’ ka scene likha Rediff me…sala uski kursi Rediff waloon ne keench li…aur sala puri public uski pant keench ke utaaari…..
bava Pratim aisa mat karo yaaar….apni Personal ambition ke liye Public ka mazaa math kharab karo yaaaar….
aapki upcoming ventures(great ventures…hahahaha) ko hume bhi dekhne ka mauka do mere dost…
a spoiler alert for a scary scene? ha ha ha… rgv has spoilt it himself by making it a lousy dream sequence…
Sridhar baap tu jaa mere baap, kisi aur blog mein jaake apna dil ka bharas nikaal…
Ricky learn something important in life – YOU DO NOT NEED TO LAY AN EGG TO TELL A BAD EGG FROM A GOOD ONE…
@Pratim
I im in tune with you writing. being a die hard fan of RGV, with his series of lew-downs lately, i would agree with what ever you say.
My phoonkh experience was funny ppl where laughing out loud saying “RAMU NE HAMEIN CHUUTIYA BANAAYAA YAAR”
Pratim,
Havent seen the movie yet, but going by what I have seen in Sarkar Raj, I am going agree with you.
I think RGV needs to stop screwing around, quite literally. He needs a break. I think he’s burnt out, and the focus on money making and getting laid in general has made him lose his creativity. Despite all that, I still hold him in high regard and say this with concern. Take a break RGV, go travel the world or something. And come back with some new perspective.
pratim,
thank you for your excellent piece of advice..you are a genius!!
I spent Rs.55 and 2 hours and I was not disappointed. That’s it!
@Pritam – I quite agree with the tit bits of the review of the movie, but please don’t bring unnecessary malice or anger in the reviews. What he say to others or publicly is not at all related to movie. It would have been much better if you have write a different post on RGV and his antics, not at all related to any particular movie. Even heading of this post shows personal anger………….I’m also a fan of RGV also and feels cheated and disappointed while watching movies like phoonk and contract- esp after that cheap tactic of offering 5 lac and mentioning it as one of the scariest movie, knowing that nothing this kinda thing exist in the movie- but again I feel it is his prerogative what he wants to make and it is our prerogative that what we want to watch. So no anger only disappointment…….I like you posts but don’t make them like RGV’s current movies..i.e. disappointing.
I meant I like YOUR posts.
THIS IS GENERAL COMMENT ON A THOUGHT NOT TO INDICATED PERSON.
@ sushovan- “What sells is great”, man this is the kinda thoughts now a days I’m hearing or reading again and again. If this is the case then why we ban child pornography, if it sells it is great. Why you get disappointed by new age movies of Mahesh bhatt, if it sells it is great. According to this, I think there should be one benchmark to decide the national award i.e box office collections (include other revenues also). It means that we should not consider any other criteria to decide greatness and make greatness lies in the hands of seller. If this is the case then ‘No smoking’ (just a metaphor) should bow down to any other porn movie which made more than it (I have no case against porn movies). It also means we should use every measure to sell, to generate greatness, and integrity vintergrity bhaad me jaaye. Chetan bhagat should be hailed as gretaest writer in India because he sells more than any other tom dick harry writer………….Man this kinda of thoughts creeping into our society, media or films scares me most. This would lead us to zero standards and all selling……..When People used to say “We show what sells” it was okay with me and never angered me(though it really disappointed me) but now when people say “what sells is great” then it really pisses me off.
Thanks for your views Tapan… but just like you cannot write about No Smoking without talking about Anurag Kashyap because you can see him in every frame, Ram Gopal Varma can be seen in every frame of all his films these days… and Phoonk is no exception…
@Sridhar Mayur- “But, I really feel the right to comment on someone’s hard work on a public level should be entitled only to the one who is qualified enough…who has been there, seen everything and done that successfully!!”…..Why is that so man? It means that a person who is not successful, never has right to comment on anything. Indian citizens who never participated in politics should never comment about politics on TV. Audiences should never comment on anything because they are not qualified. If being successful (assuming money here) is criteria to comment then Sajid khan is more qualified to comment then say Anurag Kashyap………..man every person who knows facts has a right to comment, whether you accept it or not its your prerogative. How come commenter has become more important then the comment. Comment should hold it value irrespective of the commenter, even if Osama bin laden give comment on social upliftment………. only exception to that would be comment based on twisted facts and personal malign.
@ Pratim (Apologies for spelling your name wrong earlier) – I can see emotions dropping from your words :-). It seems knowing someone too well is hindrance to watching movie objectively. It also seems that you know RGV well and you can see his arrogance, tricks and bullshitness on screen, but basing your opinion on that is wrong. For example it is his arrogance which speaks through the weird toys (take all), he thinks that he can make anything scary and make people feel chill through it. But if I keep this feeling from the starting of the movie (after 2-3 scenes)I can never enjoy a chill when it is due and think movie is dud………apart from this as a reviewer, additional responsibility comes to the table and consideration for more objective viewpoint is needed……….I don’t write reviews -may be someday- and this are just my views, you are free to differ (I know it is assumed but sometimes I like to give disclaimer like “you’ve right to remain silent”).
Tapan you are too sweet and make very valid points… but having reviewed films for the last five years, every week, week after week, I can assure you a proximity to a director wouldn’t have any effect on what I think of his film. Otherwise I would have loved No Smoking, which I didn’t. In fact, I liked Darling quite a bit. Tapan, in some films, the director takes over and the director’s signature fills up the entire page and the contents below the signature go for a toss. That’s what I felt about Phoonk… The director is like, “Ruk jaa… abhi darata hoon…” as opposed to “Dekhta ja, darr lag jayega.” Read Roland Barthes if you can… his theory on the death of the author… you would get what I am trying to say…
@ Tapan
Firstup, lemme say that by ’success’ I dont mean money, so the point relating to Sajid and Anurag is unnecessary and uncalled for…I feel Anurag is a Great filmmaker and kudos to him for making ‘Black Friday’….I wished to see ‘Paanch’(if I am right)….I am sure thats also a wonderful watch….I am waiting for Anurag’s films and would watch them with great enthu….
Coming to the point of ‘right to comment on a public level’, yes you maybe right when you say…anyone can comment, anyone can have a view….but, to ridicule someone on a public level..thats not relevant, uncalled for! Its more idiotic when someone whos done that backtracks and says that he hasnt done it personally, dont u think thats bullshit! I talked about calibre because of this…got meee….
Alrite mate…Sorry, if I am getting too animated here…
You can comment or have a view…but try to be rational enough…and keep it to the movie or the story line… dont get into the territory where you tarnish someones image…..
and regarding Pratims take on ‘RGV on each frame of Phoonk’…On the contrary some scenes were directed by one of his assistants…..so, he hasn’t seen the movie quite closely as he would have done for a Anurag’s film…
Hope you got my point….
Thanks…and as Pratim suggested…Im moving on to another Blog…thats RGV’s blog…apni khundas nikalne….hahahaha…chalo bhai c ya….(but, Pratim did you really read my earlier comments closely…hmmm)
@Pratim – Thanks for the comment but I’m not sweet. I’m normally polite unless something pisses me off (such as “what sells is great” comment above). I never meant ‘knowing someone’ as ‘proximity’. Knowing someone means by following his work, interviews and views, but yeah proximity does leads to that. If you’ve said this, ‘in this film, the director takes over and the director’s signature fills up the entire page and the contents below the signature go for a toss’ (altered a little), then it would have been great but I objected to ‘The kid, of course, has to fly around in different parts of the room defying Newton’s theory.’ or ‘Why are all of his characters in the last so many films such pathetic caricatures?’ or ‘Ramu chacha, you blame Anurag Kashyap for going back on his words…’, this was uncalled for. Supernatural itself means defying theories, seeing unseen, so that’s why that kid comment is uncalled for. What I mean is sentence was wrong though intention may be correct like nothing scary about flying kid or it is not relevant etc etc…….beg to differ but I found nothing scary about mirror scene it was very predictable. I think main consideration for horror movie should be unpredictability (Door bell in Bhoot), believable plot and events (including ambiance)…….very true abt “Ruk jaa… abhi darata hoon…”, I would have stopped, if I believed he would scare me
. Infact in first half I was watching the movie very intently thinking kucch to aayega, but after 10 mints of second half, I was swearing and making fun like mad……..neways we should leave this conversation here……It’s sad you didn’t liked ‘No smoking’, it was my fav bollywood movie for last year and its very personal…….I’ll surely try to read Roland Barthes.
@Sridhar Mayur – I took Sajid khan and anurag akshyap (coz at that time I can’t think of any director who is good but never gave a hit) as metaphor. My point was why would only successful people would be qualified to comment and who should be called qualified, it is all very complicated to decide. ‘but, to ridicule someone on a public level..thats not relevant’….I do understand what you meant to say but what is ridiculing somebody, if I say I don’t like any of his work or his work is unwatchable or unreadable, some people might consider it as ridiculing. You see ridiculing somebody is very personal and contextual esp in written words. But yeah it is not right when facts are twisted……’says that he hasn’t done it personally’…sab kucch niji hai. Even if somebody says it is professional hazard den also it is personal coz he is compromising his personal opinion, views and thoughts to achieve professionally. I think better suited sentence would be ’says that he hasn’t done it intentionally’. I do hate hypocricy and lie as you mentioned…….’but try to be rational enough’ again the same old age debate that who would decide what is rational. Thats why in democarcy we’ve created a solution stating majority opinion is rational
. But yeah I do understand that what you meant to say is integrity of article should remain intact…….If image is not correct then it should be tarnished and neways Image is perception and if perceptions are changing then image should change with it……….Don’t get me wrong that I’m picking sentences in between to create effect. What I meant is I’m all for ridiculing, personal objection and irrational thought but it should be honest and adhering to facts……….and i don’t know how Pratim has come into picture here. We are discussing a thought not Pratim and you are making it personal. 
…..I’ll also scribble something on his blog and it’ll be not positive.
@Tapan
When you say that “Why Pratim has come into picture”…then I should be saying Why did you get into the picture…picture means the actual debate(or watever) between me and Pratim…
Alrite dude…its too complicated…coz you have to read Pratims blog first then all my comments…then his reply to my comments…and also considering other comments and then his reply to his comments…this has been happening for days…so lets leave it here!!…coz noone’s gonna give up his point of view….everyone has one ;)….lol….
Take care machs….
phir kabhi…kya..
Sridhar – i think its ridiculous to say u can only comment on movies if u have made them. i think common sense understanding and experience in watching and appreciating a wide variety and number of movies should be enough. and Pratim qualifies on all those counts – from attending his entertainment quizes in kolkata- i can say he has enough knowledge abt movies to comment on them.
you have every right to differ with his views -but you don’t have a right to ask him not to express them. leave those kinda stuff to the sangh.
pratim – i’m a sucker for horror -adnd a sucker for rgv too -and like you said – movie after movie we go to the theater hoping this time this time ramu will be his old self – this time he will deliver something – but after company (and to some extent bhoot and nissabd ) -its always dissapointment that lies in store- that and the jarring music.
people might feel offended by your asking him to stop making films – but you know what sandipan chattopadhay the author said once- ” some people keep writing just because they are alive “.
maybe ramu has run of of stories to tell- so why not stop to take stop and catch your breath for a little while -may be the magic will come back – for truly it was once there in his movies in no uncertain measure – till then i can only hoep he does not degrade himself further by gloating over the same piece of pie that anees baazmee movies hanker for.
sushovan if what sells is great – then lets at least be honest and stop calling these people artistes -lets just call them movie sellers or filmbikretas or something- lets stop the hypocrisy.
if i have not commented much abt the film -its coz i don’t have anything new to add to what has been already said -interesting if sometimes taxing camera angles – loud music -average acting -and a few good moments intersperced with totally “unscary” mumbojumbo.
by the way ,pratim -thook -lol- now that rocks(may be we can a rgv fact website on the lines of chuck norris facts -naah thats unkind)
partha
partha
saw it finally. loved the film. I never realized all that has been talked about over the last few weeks. it was a tight, gripping, entertaining film, full of his flourishes. Don’t get me wrong, but I guess its good for me that I don’t read his blog or watch his interviews, for the film still remains fresh and new to explore. will be watching Sarkar Raj soon, waiting for Contract’s DVD.