Shanghai Nights in Sankat City
THE MONK WITH WINGS -
“What do you need for the scene,” asks Chikna.
“A BEST bus full of passengers and of course Rimi and Chunky.”
“How many junior artists?”
“Well, the seating capacity is 72, give me atleast a 100.”
“Out of the question, too expensive.”
“Okay, get me a mini bus from BEST with 50 passengers.”
“We can provide 25.”
“But the scene demands a city bus bursting at its seams with passengers, it won’t work with lesser.”
“25 it is.”
“No way!”
“I’m sure you can find a way. Let’s talk tomorrow.”
I storm into ‘deewan-e-khas’, its empty.
Cut to – Night, I’m sitting with Chiru and Ashwani at SHANGHAI, a quarter system watering hole in Goregaon East. I’ve made up my mind to cancel the bus shoot till I make Chikna see some sense. Ashwani suggests that I don’t cancel ‘actors ke dates hain, kaise bhi karke khatam karte hain’.
As I dilute my rum with tears, an old and drunk monk totters to our table, plonks himself on the empty chair next to me and whispers to me, “Slope! Bus going up the slope and then down. Things move. Slapstick, silent 2 reelers!!”
My eyes light up, “Yes of course, why didn’t I think of it?!! No need of junior artists either.”
Chiru blinks at me, “Whom are you talking to?”
“The monk sitting next to me.”
“What monk?!”
The monk winked at me, got up and wobbled away. He had a pair of withered wings on his back.
I share the new scene idea with my buddies. They are of the opinion it could work. I sleep over it, fill in the details. Yes, I can make it work.
Next day –
Chikna asks, “Kuchch socha? Can you make do with 25 junior artists?”
“Stuff 21 up your a**, gimme 4, I’m rewriting the scene.”
“Good. Can’t get you a BEST bus, too expensive, make do with a private bus.”
I clench my fists and get ready to charge at Chikna.
“Take it easy, we’ll get it painted like a BEST bus.”
“Abbe slow motion, that’ll cost you more than hiring one.”
“Okay, we’ll provide you a BEST bus, the mini kind.”
“No way, I need the big one.”
“Location?”
“Road full of slopes. New MHADA Goregaon East.”
“You got it.”
I think the new scene is quirkier, thanks to the monk and of course, Chikna.
ANOTHER SHANGHAI NIGHT –
I was meeting Sanjay Mishra after years. We’d worked together on many of my short films (Bheja Fry) for Channel V. He’s a fine actor with a great sense of comic timing, he’s quite whacky in real life too. Somehow we had drifted apart and I wanted to touch base with him and convince him to do Lingam’s role for Sankat City. He finished shooting at Filmcity and came by to Shanghai.
I ordered old monk, he ordered smirnoff. We got drunk. We talked about the good old times. I narrated the story of Sankat City and talked about his role. He was hesitant in the beginning, but slowly warmed up to the role. Finally he said yes. We continued drinking. He asked me to narrate the story in detail, which I did over chicken kababs.
We got sozzled. He looked me in the eye and slurred, “Why didn’t you offer me Guru’s role?”
I slurred back, “I’m sorry, but I don’t see you in that role.”
“Why, you think I can’t carry it off?”
“Its not that.”
“Then what is it?”
“Maybe I’m playing it safe. Maybe I don’t have the balls to cast you in that role. Maybe I’ve sold out. But then, maybe I’ve not and I’m doing the right thing…”
“Teri bhen ki…” – followed by the choicest of expletives. Heads turned, we were in the spotlight.
In a flash he dunked his drink into the kababs and walked off. The waiter put the bill on the table. I checked the bill. I didn’t have enough cash on me.
“I stay nearby and I come here often. Let me go get the cash.”
“No problem, you can give it tomorrow.”
I finished my drink, squeezed out water from a soggy chicken piece and as I was gulping it down, Sanjay’s driver walked into the frame.
“Voh bill sir…”
“No problem, main de doonga.”
“Nahin sir, saab ne mana kiya hai.”
Few minutes later, I walked out of Shanghai. Sanjay’s gaadi was parked outside and he was taking a leak in a dark alley. He turned around and said, “I’ll do it.”
“Lingam?”
“Yes.”
He zipped up and gave me a hug. “Can I drop you at home?”
THE MONK RETURNS -
EXT. GATEWAY OF INDIA – DAY
“Raja ki aayegi baarat” being played by a Shaadiwala BrassBand. The boisterous Baraatis dance and burst crackers. The flower bedecked Bridegroom on the horse is busy talking on his cellphone. The chat over, he switches off the phone, slips out a pistol from his belt and fires a shot in the air. The Baraatis freeze, the Band stops playing.
The scene appears towards the beginning of the film and what better backdrop for it than the Gateway for a film called Sankat City. Dulha, ghodi, baraati aur band to mile, but I ended up shooting the scene against the backdrop of a couple of apartment buildings at the other end of Filmcity.
When we saw the rushes Chiru got depressed as hell. It looked terrible visually. That night, at the Shanghai, it was Chiru’s turn to dilute his rum with tears.
“Not your fault dost”.
“Magar naam to mera hee kharaab hoga na.”
He then started talking to the empty chair next to him.
“Abbe kis se baat kar raha hai?”
“The old monk with withered wings. He’s back”
“And what does he say?”
Chiru told me what the monk whispered to him. The baraat scene happens to be from a B Movie Gogi Kukreja is shooting, its title being ‘Gunmaster Gagan’. So I got the VFX guys to add scratches and watermarks, gave it a faded old movie look. Sure it looks dirty, but design element waala dirty, tashan waala dirty. Ab koi mai ka laal naheen keh sakta ki scene ganda shoot hua hai.
If anyone wants to meet the monk, visit Shanghai. Those who don’t know where it is, go past Dindoshi bus depot, pass Gokuldham signal and look right, you can’t miss it.
‘I don’t like jail, they got the wrong kind of bars in there’
– Charles Bukowski
By the by, those who haven’t yet, check out ‘Barfly’ and ‘Factotum’ – nice films, based on Bukowski’s life and writings.
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
Hahaha hilarious Pankaj bhai.I certainly need to visit Shanghai sometime soon.I’m an Old Monk bhakt too like you.Lets see what the monk would tell me when I’m there.Keep enthralling us with your anecdotes.
OMR, OCR aur OPR…the three old musketeers…sabse acha to lekin ‘Celebration’ hai..aur ‘Johar’ bhi…ha ha..kersone se banta hai..
ha ha…trivia
What would old monk say when you touch his feet with respect?
Peete raho…
great post. do keep us entertained with interesting titbits about the experiences of shooting the film. did u zero in on any tag line?
freaking hillarious post! the monk has showed me the way so far and i hope he continues to do.
Pankaj have u met my other friend … gold reserve??? I am sure he will give luck and ideas too… But monk is good too!!!
now i get what was i missing !! …… the “MONK” ……
P.S. peeyo pilao film banao.
I am sure, u’ll credit Old Monk in your movie:
Special thank
Old Monk :D
heh eh
Your monk sounds cool, visits bars. That must be the reason, Munna and circuit never sat in bars. After all cant expect our bapu to show up in bars! Good think you were having old monk and the monk appeared. Just think if were having cobra beer…
saalon, yeh PFC hai ya BKJ (bewdon ki jamaat)!
@Ram,Vinay – nice ones.
Sankat City – the SHANGAI!!
freakin hilarious ………do you have a daaru scene in your movie too ,would have loved to see your old monk.
great insight into the life of a monk. i also adore him, but mostly at home.
tagline finalised yet? when do u plan to release sankat city?
@Vineet – ek daaru scene hai na, chhota sa.
@Satyendra – ’sabka band bajega’. i’ve been informed its June, most probably the 19th.
Good going,..plz keepnthe bakchodi going…PFC mein nai jaan daal di hai..
Excellent…Old Monk helps..drink it from a katori with a wee bit of tap water..bade shubh chintan hua karte hain uske baad! Purane dost naye nazar aatey hain…
Never try it in front of Old girl friends..they dont turn monks after your utterances!
Good going Pankaj!
Smooth write up..:)
old monk rocks…
hopefully ur film will too…
so all the best.
Hi Pankaj! It seems like you’ve been through a lot of turbulent times while making this film. Here’s hoping that the fruit of your labour is sweet…very sweet. On our part, we will go out there and see the movie for sure. Your blogs always make interesting reading. My compliments to the creator/creators of this site. It’s wonderful, informative and entertaining.
My father worshipped the winged monk all his life. Now my partner swears by it!
As Homer Simpson rightfully said-:Here’s to alcohol: The source of, and answer to, all of life’s problems”. I’ll drink to that!! Hic!
@Pankaj
When you make the DVD of this film, and if you include the feature “deleted scenes”, you can name the feature .. “Scene-Cut City” …
Buddhe Baba ki jai ho…..bhakto ko wohi sahi raasta dikhate hai….i have been ardent devotee for as long as i can remember
good tag line pankaj sweet and simple. will be at some theatre on 19 for ur movie. best of luck.
Buddhe baba ki jai ho!
How did i miss this post?
Always knew I am not alone, guided by http://udtahaathi.wordpress.com/2009/02/15/pegged-forever/my Old Monk.
Thanks for the Bukowski films too .
Cheers!
@Uh – no sir, you’re not alone! :-) your post on O M is wonderful. nice pics too!
@Pankaj
Cosmic! It had to be the moment he was taking a leak that he agreed to do the role of Lingam! get it get it?