The End??!!
I’ve a belief that your story is as good as its ending…if that holds any truth then my story has definately gone for a toss!!
I joined the team of Dhokha on 2nd August’06 as a 4th AD. It was my first film and i was glad to be a part of the team…hungry to learn and eager to observe. By the time the film started i was promoted to being 2nd AD.
The shoot began on 5th April ‘07…on 7th June’07 with 3 days of shoot left, i was asked to submit my resignation and i’m no more part of the film!!!
How much energy we end up spending on planning and scheeming events but then events happen that make you aware- a lot is just not in your hands!!
As i write this i realise that although i thought i had taken it in my stride…i’m getting a strange feeling as i recount the day and the events happened that day…
I’m not flawless…definately not…i’ve made mistakes…and when i do them i’m the first to offer my ass to be spanked.
That day an actor was required to be shaved for the sequence we were shooting…i was under the impression that there is still an hour for the shot to be ready and i was getting the junior artists ready…also two of the junior artists were to be given dialogues and they were in no way doing justice to the 6 lines that they had to deliver(and that too in front of Anupam Kher!!) Just as i got the actors ready in dress and with their lines learnt…i was told that we would need 2 people dressed as Kashmiri Cops, as i ran to get that organised, the shot was ready, by the time i reached the set, the shot was about to be taken and it was a crane-trolly shot. Pooja mam asked me to give passing of junior artists but i had not seen the frame- i did not know the movement of the trolly- fuck-fuck-fuck-my mind said-i looked blank- i looked at Anupam Kher-Tulip Joshi- and the third actor Abbhay standing on thier mark and thats when i saw his stuble- i froze – he was supposed to be shaved!!, the director screamed- “Amey do you know the shot?”
“No mam…i do not know the shot…i’m sorry mam but i have not seen the frame”- i said and then it happened(round one)….”Leave the set”..i heard but i did not believe it…she must have said something else…or may be to someone else…(i had the continuity sheet in my hand)…”Amey, keep the book down and leave the set now”…i felt a burst of hot air going through my ears and nostrils. Robotically i kept the book and started walking out…i could feel some hands patting my back…but i could not see any faces clearly. We were shooting in a mill in dadar…the mill is on a sea shore…i went out and stood staring at the horizon…”Life…Life…Life”, i was saying…in the distant background i could hear “Start Sound-Camera- Act…”, i walked away…the scene was complete, Bhatt saab came out, he saw me standing, “Ja Ja andar jha” I went inside and tried to help, tried to get noticed but then Pooja mam did not pay attention to me…i had no idea of the round two coming up-
The same actor had to be shaved in the next scene as well- but the scene after that required him to have a stuble(we film-makers and our desire to recreate life!!!!!!). I told the chief AD- that how will we manage if he shaves now? i suggested that why dont we shoot the stuble sequence first and the clean shaven later…”..”Fuck it” he said…”Just ask him to shave”…”woh baadmein dekhte hai kya karna hai”…i insisted again but same was the reply, it happened in front of the actor, make-up and dress- the actor shaved- one scene happened and when it came to the next i was called and asked why he is shaved? I said i had told that we wud have a problem- my chief did not acknowledge that i had told him- the actor wanted to go and tell Pooja mam but she had already made up her mind. I was lying she said, i am not, i retorted. She got angry…she came to slap me…i retracted…she screamed even more and then it was the “Begining of the End”. I was asked to write my resignation letter, i did becasue i felt defeated…i surrendered…i did not have the will to prove my innocense…i did not ahve the energy to plead… i wrote my resignation…and left…
There is only one question i asked y self- “Did you in anyway be insincere or inadequate in your job?” i heard a “NO” from within…
So its back to square one now…may the journey begin…again!
Anurag Kashyap
Abhay Deol
Dibakar Banerjee
Hansal Mehta
Khalid Mohamed
Kundan Shah
Anish Kuruvilla
Jaideep Verma
Manish Gupta
Navdeep Singh
Bhavani Iyer
D. Santosh
Onir
Ashvin Kumar
Ramu Ramanathan
Sudhir Mishra
Pankaj Advani
Revathy
Saurabh Shukla
Shilpa Shukla
Sujoy Ghosh
Suparn Verma
Santosh Sivan
Shashank Ghosh
Shivajee
Pavan Kaul
Partho Sen-Gupta
Prroshant Naryannan
Sam Langoria
Satish Kasetty
Hang in there, buddy. Remember that what doesn’t destroy you, defines you. Get defined.
By the way, I’m always amazed by this Bollywood obsession to slap people. “She got angry
happens Amey …
cant help it at times. ..
all the best for ur future :-)
Manish-
I was begining to think somethings wrong with me for considering the actions like(chair carrying) waste of mind and body, i’m glad someone else too thinks that way and yes “Feudal” is the word!!
Would a little less energy be invested in ego handling and insecurity satisfaction, i’m sure film-making will begin to look better.
Kartik-
Thanks friend:)
WHAT THE FUCK… !!!!!! [edited by admin]
oooo!
hey oz u seem to be taking this to another level. Let me clarify for all fellow readers here that i’ve no intent of maligning or blaming anybody through my blogg except for one factor- “Miscommunication” and “Haste”…
I definately want to highlight the fact that when certain decisions are taken that affect someone deeply and seriously they need to be probed into with a calmer and rational frame of mind. what happened here was Pooja mam’s reaction to a continuity hiccup which would stand out in a film where her name stands out on the posters. Yes, i do regret the fact that the blame was not entirely mine so much to cost me my job as for the past 10 months of my life all i had on my mind was this film. but then…shit happens
hey friend! don’t worry.
this may be the part of your journey towards success.
at this “khaali” time may god have given u the opportunity for seeing movies, writing scripts etc. work related to cinema.
Do and tell us.
Hey Amey,
Don’t worry pal…this happens all the time… Their loss, not yours. Remember, when u are mistreated and the gun pointed at u is pointed so with no logic as to why the target is you; either the person with the gun does not know what he/she wants or he/she is heavily dependent upon a wretched gun to flaunt might.
Fuck ups do happen… Let this one just pass… Let it go… No one’s worth it… Move on… Someone just shot themselves in their foot…and its them…So chill… This momentary phase shall pass away too.
A couple of days back RGV told me something which I shall always remember. He said, “One important thing one should learn in this industry is to keep moving. The moment you stop, you are a dead horse”. How true! I love him for this piece of advice. Working with him has been a truly rewarding experience and I really value his advice whenever he has something to tell me. So trust me pal, take this advice… Im sure you will rock one day!
My best wishes, pal.
Cheers,
Milind
I have worked with many directors. It has been either my luck or my sense to avoid these so called “off-the-fuse-means-iam-creative-directors”.
The directors I have worked with, even under tremendous pressure used to respect their assistants, just smile or give a “look” at mistakes but never insult their assistants in front of others. In fact, there was a time when my director supported me and fought with the actor even though it was my mistake.
If the director thinks he/she is awesomely talented just because they treat people like shit, I totally disagree. I think they are the most shithole of directors ever lived. Like Sanjay Leela Bhansali throwing hot coffee on an assistants face.
Pooja Bhatt was a flop actor(except for her controversies), is a flop director and and a bad human being.
Buddy, thank god you left a sure shot flop project.
Hey Amey,
I am writing in becuase i think you are a good guy with some bad luck. THis is a major setback for you but dont let it screw your mind bro.
I must say you were always working with the wrong production. The bhatt camp is full of BLOODY CHUTIYAS making DVD cut & paste flicks.
I would advice you to seriously seek out directors like Khanduri, RGV, Raju Hirani, Rohan Sippy, Anurag kashyap or even new guys like Homi Adjania. I dont think you will suffer this kind of NONSENSE with professional people who really know their jobs. Never work with Pretenders with Attitude.
amey…
this is not something which is exclusive to the film fraternity. u are forever gonna be confronted with such ‘bosses’ who stretch it all the time.
being apathetic to such unprofessional behaviour is something you learn as you go along.
as long as your conscience is clear
chill bro…
move on..
hope someday u will be on the directors chair and u get to show everyone how to react to such a situation professionally ..
cheers
Pooja bhatt is breathing in Dhokha already done Paap..soon will be back on sadak (road)Amey bro…Yours mistake too, blame it for bad company..As Mahesh bhatt said ke ja ja ander ja.You will be back..In ours.. filmmaking is like “ladki ki saadi” where producer behave like father and dir. appears as mother..Hoz poz..finally done..
wow.. this is ridiculous.. amey, though it may be hard, try not to treat it as a major setback.. as the age old adage goes, “everything happens for a reason”.. we just don’t know what that reason is yet.. keep your chin up.. it WILL get better.
Dear all…
This is beyond expression. When i wrote this blogg today morning all i was doing is puking my mind, never did i believe that at the end of the day this blogg will give so much strength and hope. All you fellow dreamers i must say i appreciate your support and wud just want to reach out to all of you and let you all know- “Its made a difference, Thanks”
Shailesh,striker,atray, DPac, Just Another, Struggler, Machchar,Milind…thanks a lot.
I’ve always believed when people are walking towards the same destination, why shouldnt they all walk together…as we all walk towards making quality cinema i see ourselves as making this journey together rather than conflicting and obstructing one another..what say!
Hey oz…this is a great place bro.
Amey bhai, however difficult it is, move on bro! Sab theek hogayega and an yr from now u will write an experience which will have a better ending.
Vent everything out here, PFC gang is here for you.
All the best bro! Keep Walking…
Amey,in times like this when you in a resigned state of mind say shit happens, take it to another level and with faith affirm ‘this too shall pass.’Pooja is a teacher for you in disguise.Some lesson you had to learn in your growth and evolvement.What’s that lesson well it is for you to figure out. It may be clear to you now itself or may become clear in future. Till then just move on no doubt, but with this realisation that when your day comes you won’t be like your tormentors. And that’s one of the lessons the Universe gives you through teachers (not directors) like Pooja.wish you the best.
Amey bro will always be there and together for quality cinema..’PFC ki kasam’..cheers..:)
Man, my heart goes out for you.
This is the very reason I have always advised everybody to not work in more than 2 films as an AD. Its the worst job in the industry. Thankless.
Make sure you get credit for your work & time you gave them. I hope this blog doesn’t come in your way of getting that.
******
Last Film – CQ directed by Roman Coppolla (7/10)
Music – Thirty Spokes by Yohimbe Brothers
Saw these guys live in Downtown LA Block Party. Awesome band.
I can relate to you Ameya. All I’ll say is that, its their loss and not yours. Its good that you left, coz theres better in store for you. that wasn’t meant for u.
they were ur boss,
they didnt realise their loss,
u’ve won the toss,
now u become the boss
all the best for ur future.. am sure am gonna see u as a bright film maker very soon. and yes work on some decent production/director and not dvd copy-paste folks.
Iskay baad kuch achcha bhi hua ke nahin? Dukh bhari dastaan he likhna kyun zaroori hai, kuch hansne hasanay ki bhi baat ho jaye. Update karo, let’s not hear only the sad bits but the good things as well and the lessons learned along the way. So take some time out and write away.